The Seminary DropOut

What was the common theme of the 3 out of 4?

2012-01-30T07:49:00.001-06:00

When my wife and I dated, I told her that I loved her for amonth before she returned the favor. Now before you claim me a ‘sucker’ andhopeless romantic, know that I was her friend for approximately 2 years beforewe dated; so I felt comfortable in baring my soul. I hadperiodically exposed my vulnerabilities throughout our friendship. She was notso open in sharing her life stories. It figured, as there are clear stereotypes towards women versus men.However with time and determination, I truly got to know her. She or I have never experiencedthis level of intimacy. I believe our individual significant heartbreaks connected us. Our truedesire not to re-live or go through the self-induced experiences. Exposing and committing to not repeating our failures with the help of God enhanced every area of our relationship.

Most are aware that 50% or more of married couples areending their unions, annually. Some are surprised when their friends call itquits, while others are not. In the early 2000s, I had a professional phototaken of me, 4 friends, and one of my friend’s son. The natural stage of aman’s life occurred… we got married. Unfortunately, only 1 of those 4 guysremains in his marital relationship. Was this surprising? Somewhat. We (all)were men who had accepted Christ and I believe (still) truly desireto please Him. However, 75% of my close friends played a role in ending theirmost intimate earthly relationship.

In reflecting on these marriages, there wasa common theme. Lack of intimacy… verbally, emotionally, and relational. As theunknown date of their disunion became closer, you could visually and physicallyidentify the disconnect. Unfortunately, my friends were unaware and possiblycareless of their connections. The unwillingness to share, listen, sacrifice,and commit took its toll and the inevitable took place.

I relate these relationships to a person’s individualrelationship to God. God has clearly revealed his passionate love for you inall ways. Fortunately, he has significant amounts of patience. He can endurelonger than a month of saying ‘I love you’ before moving on to the next soul. Similarto marriage, it takes sincere expression to experience a high level of intimacyand its benefits. If you are unwilling to be humble, express gratitude and yourdesire and need for the relationship; you can expect a breach or hardships. Theless you choose to share, the greater the disconnect becomes. Honestly, it’s a simpleprinciple. The concept of becoming one requires being vulnerable in yourrelationship with God and your spouse. It’s very possible that the things you areafraid to share and do may be the ‘glue’ that holds your relationship togetherfor a lifetime.

If you feel separate from God and have yet to accept JesusChrist as Lord and Savior, allow me to confirm your unhealthy spiritualrelationship. Begin the process of being able to have strong unions with peopleby accepting the ultimate prototype for all relationships.

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as your Lordand Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.intouch.org/resources/all-things-are-new/content/topic/how_do_i_accept_jesus_as_my_savior_all_things

Idiot: A foolish or stupid person.

2012-01-16T16:35:00.002-06:00

I've noticed a common theme in my blogs. I seem to talk much about my life in thepast, and then I relate it to my current and future. I’m not ‘knocking myself’,but maybe it’s time for a different style, a different approach. I sincerelyhave a heart for people to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. There’s franklyno other reason why I write these blogs than for this reason alone. This world(our country) is definitely in need of some humble praying and clear obedienceand serving to a holy God. As cliché as it sounds, there is no better time thannow to submit your life to God through Jesus Christ.

I havealways been labeled by my wife and close friends as being quite blunt and excellingin TMI-ing (too much information). As a matter of fact, on Halloween day, mythree year old son who verbally refused to physically allow a Reese’s PeanutButter Cup to enter his bag was accused of having his dad’s trait by hisgrandmother (my mother-in-law). He doesn’t like peanut butter and clearly didn’tsee a problem with letting anyone know, including his giver. Of course, I havelearned to keep my views to myself a little better than my youngest son, but Istill have a strong opinion. With this said, my beliefs that the Bible has theanswers to all of life’s problems are stronger than ever.

The resultsfrom constant rejection of God’s way are evident; the whole blessing, which God’spromises from an obedient life of serving Him is absent. Unnecessary strugglesare given to those who choose to reject His way (Deuteronomy 28:15-68). Inlife, there are expected challenges; so, one would think that a person wouldaccept an easier way of living, when offered the opportunity. Surprisingly,most choose to scuffle with accepting; while, each rebellious act leads to deeperenslavement.

The jokeis truly on you, if you believe that accepting Christ will limit your ‘fun’. Either,you will become a slave to Him or the other, so you might as well choose a ‘Master’that is willing to offer you a good return. Not one that will cause you to loseyour family, job, self-respect, health, family, and finances. There are so many worldly examples whichhave been provided for us. With God’s discernment, you don’t need to tune to aChristian radio or television station to hear a sermon. Jesus may not be specificallymentioned, but that typically is exactly why the story is a story… ‘if youcatch my drift’.

Thebenefits of living for God should inspire you, but quite honestly there’s somuch more. God loves you and has practically set up a ‘no-fail, how to handle’ systemfor every area of life. Of course, this does not guarantee a pain-free life. Alife of obedience to God’s commandments produces sustainable peace, joy, andfreedom. If you choose to obey and serve Him, no life situation will take theseattributes away from you. So, if you have yet to accept SERVING and OBEYING theone and only God (Father of Jesus Christ), who has already set up a blessingplan for you… Stop being an idiot and do so!

http://www.intouch.org/resources/all-things-are-new/content/topic/how_do_i_accept_jesus_as_my_savior_all_things

How much will that cost?

2011-12-06T10:02:00.001-06:00

Long distance running has always been a challenge for me. I’ve had the hardest time meeting my miles, due to lack of enthusiasm and proper planning. Running a 5k race, 10k race, half-marathon, or marathon has been an unattained goal for sometime. With proper training, I’m pretty confident that I can complete a 5k (maybe a 10k) race; however, I have yet to accomplish this goal. Every time, I hear that another co-worker completed a half or full marathon; my level of admiration towards running increases. I continue assuring myself that one day; I will sign up for a race, train, and complete my goal. I guess one day, I will. Until then, I have comforted myself with unfulfilled promises (Ecclesiastes 5:5).

Am I lazy and would hate the training? I doubt it. I love exercising. Long distance running is a different type of physical fitness than my familiar resistance and interval training workouts. However, experience and research assures me that I would be fine. I simply need to decide and start.

The decision is my dilemma. Do I really want to endure the training it takes to run a long distance event? To be successful, I would need to allot an extended amount of time away from my old way of living. This would be sacrificial and uncomfortable. When completing a long distance event becomes my most important physical fitness goal, I will be more apt to accomplish.

Those of you who have completed a 5k (or more) race may ridicule my unmet goal. Thinking to yourself, ‘Really, 3.2 miles! Come on personal trainer… Surely, you can do that!?! ‘Sometimes, I say the exact same things to myself. However, there are so many factors which I allow to hold me back (marriage, children, job, career, and other goals). After identifying all my current life involvement, it would be premature and ignorant to label me as lazy. Clearly, running a marathon is secondary… making it more difficult to achieve.

Luke 14:28 encourages us to ‘sit down and count the cost’ before we begin. ‘Choosing not to’ regarding a major life decision can be costly. Starting and not completing may lower you and others esteem, confidence, and respect. This principle applies to all facets of life from fitness, financial, to relational. Those who have experienced a broken relational promise may unanimously agree that there confidence, respect, and esteem for the involved party (including themselves) deteriorated.

Every vow has a ‘finish line’. When most set out to accomplish a goal, they envision how they will end. Typically, those who finish what they start maintain that mental snapshot until completion. It would be quite strange to witness a 100-yard dash and only 50% of the runners complete. Even weirder, if 5 out of the 10 marathoners saw another race they liked while running their race; then jumped over to the other marathon to complete that race. That would be extremely odd and strange to witness. Although, I believe this is symbolically witnessed everyday.

Determining the importance of your goal and what you will and want to achieve before you start is key. If your goal is not one of the most important factors in your life and you are unwilling to sacrifice until that commitment is fulfilled, biblical wisdom strongly suggests that you should not accept the challenge. From financing a car to marriage to losing 10 pounds, ‘count up the cost’. Take into consideration what it will take for you to meet, maintain, and sustain your goals. Of course, you may begin a journey and realize that it was tougher than you imagined. Examining your expectations versus life demands before committing will greatly increase your success.

God’s word points to the celebration of finishing the race and keeping the faith (2 Timothy 4:7). As it will take faith and determination to achieve and believe you can meet your Godly goals during those challenging days. Envision what you want before you start (Proverbs 29:18). My personal belief (from experience) is most people who are considered lazy and unfocused are not. They have simply not made that ‘department in their life’ a priority. It’s easy to do. Although, you do have an option to refocus by determining the importance of your chosen commitment or goal. If you have yet to decide, this is a good message in helping you realize the importance of accepting any type of commitment. Be sure you can afford it. Also, determine your willingness to be a good steward before you agree. Start with taking care of the current blessings (career, home, health, children, and wife/husband). Before accepting other commitments, visualize your end and believe that you can do it. Allow God to earthly and heavenly reward your obedience (Matthew 25:23).

Some challenges are harder to achieve than others. No matter your human capacity, you are unable to overcome. I have faced similar trials. My humble plea and request in sustaining, while thriving, to my commitments to God through Jesus Christ have been a saving grace. I realized that it would take more than positive thinking and accountability. Some challenges are greater than you and others. In these cases, you need something greater for sustainability. This would be the One who God has exalted above all things (Philippians 2:9). Accepting Him is a surefire way that you will achieve all God’s goals for your life. If you are struggling with a promise that God has offered all of mankind, your problem may be your unwillingness to humble yourself and acknowledging that you need help.

Examine yourself. Determine the importance of your goals and commitments. If you have accepted a commitment, accept God’s help to see it through completion. When making goals, be sure that they are godly and you are willing to do all it takes. Know what your obstacles may/will be. God’s will is not for you to be in physical debt to yourself, mental debt to your friends and family, or financial debt to a creditor. The only debt that he allows is love (Romans 13:7-8). Keep the faith and finish the race that you start. The world desperately needs to see it!

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.intouch.org/resources/all-things-are-new/content/topic/how_do_i_accept_jesus_as_my_savior_all_things

Dancing and Hollering

2011-11-16T17:05:00.003-06:00

Growing up in Southern Illinois, I clearly took the beautiful colors of oak and maple trees during the fall season for granted. Now, that I live in north Texas, the gorgeous colors of red, orange, and burgundy are greatly missed. In order to get my ‘fix’, I planted two maple and red oak trees in my yard. They’re currently in infant stage, so they really don’t provide much color during the fall. So in order to possibly see these vibrant colors, we have to go to older neighborhoods or parks. Recently, my family and I discovered a way of witnessing the season change by visiting the nearest lake. It’s populated with native Texas trees which leaves don’t turn from green to yellow like most in the area. On our latest hike at the lake, we accidentally navigated off the man-made course to a rock covered road. Although, we were not in the heart of the heavy wooded park; there were adorable trees aligned along the road.

My children have discovered a new happiness regarding the family hikes. On this particular day, we tagged along with our neighbors and their children. Their son is three years younger than our oldest, Bryce, and three years older than our youngest, Caleb. The three typically have no problems playing together; however, at times, Caleb apparently feels babied and left out. Due to his age, ability to keep up, and the terrain of the trail, we always have a jogging stroller nearby. Caleb mostly desires to walk with everyone, while occasionally announcing his independence of his parents and big brother. As we approached a large hill, I asked if he wanted to ride. He declined. We have noticed that hiking up a hill is not as difficult as descending. The loose gravel and dirt in a downward angle increases the chances of losing your balance. Caleb nicely climbed and completed the hill at the back of the pack. I and others, being ahead, (excluding his close-by mother) suddenly heard an outburst of crying and yelling. As we turned around to see what the fuss was about, we noticed that Caleb had fallen and scraped his leg. As he hollered, he danced, then he hollered and danced some more. His mother nicely placed him on her leg to visually examine his wound. Over his yells and kicking feet, my wife asked for water to cool. As she poured water over the friction, everyone noticed that it was minor and continued to hike. However, Caleb kept crying and momma kept hugging and coddling. Eventually, I had to pick him up, place him in the stroller, and inform him that he was fine. Although, it may appear insensitive; the ‘pushy, get over it’ method had to be applied. Even to a three year old.

I’m sure that all of us have had these moments. We get hurt, we cry and grieve; then, a caring, concerned person comforts and encourages us. Its human nature to assure that someone in pain is okay. However, after a period of time, it’s abnormal and uncomfortable witnessing someone consistently anguishing about a 30 year old occurrence. In the past, I have found it hard to let go of offenses. ‘Playing the blame game’ and reliving failed past pursuits were common. Some of my grievances were initially expected, but after a prolonged period, my self-absorption became downright obsessive and debilitating. Close friends became ‘shoulders to cry on’, while family members and authority figures were fingered as the root cause. Repetitively acknowledging past trauma is extremely unattractive and a perfect way to isolate yourself from healthy people. It’s truly best to let your hurts and disappointments go.

Please believe that I’m not heartless to whatever you or some love one may have endured. Only you and God know how what you experienced has affected you. There should definitely be a period of reflection, mourning, and healing. However, there is a point in everyone’s life where they MUST move forward for healthy overall development. It is required to experience your full potential. How silly would it have been for us to sit on the off-course rocky road for years exclaiming, ‘Oh poor, poor Caleb, he scraped his knee and hurt himself’? When you think about it in this matter, it’s comical. At some point, I’m sure our three year old would’ve eventually recognized that he was physically better and considered it foolish not to move on. Whether he proceeded or not would’ve been his choice. Fortunately for him, he believed and heeded the advice of his loving father. After being picked up, placed in a secure location, and carried for a few hundred yards; he decided to get up and live out new experiences (Psalms 30:5). The sooner, he chose to brush off the pains of his fall; the sooner, he was able to experience his purpose that day.

When healthy people realize you are safe, they move on. Sometimes, surrounding yourself with overly empathetic people can cause you to remain stagnate in life development. Understanding and relating can create a very strong connection. When you decide to move forward, while the other doesn’t; this may create an obvious dilemma. Some disassociations are beneficial for growth. Encountering loving words of accountability is helpful when dealing with hard to ‘get pass’ issues. Practicing the advice of a trusted, observant, and challenging loved one may be what you need. Take a chance and move forward by letting go of what’s holding you back from experiencing ‘what you came here to do’. You may be unaware that you are silently ‘dancing, hollering, dancing, and hollering’, while everyone around you is moving forward with life.

If you don’t have someone who will pick you up, carry you, encourage you, and proclaim you healed; I have just the person for you. As I did for my son, Jesus Christ will do for you. Heed his advice and accept His way and begin the journey of ‘doing what you came here to do’.

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.
http://www.intouch.org/resources/all-things-are-new/content/topic/how_do_i_accept_jesus_as_my_savior_all_things

Define Love.

2011-10-31T14:43:00.004-05:00

After falling to my knees and repenting of my ways, I heavily began listening to Christian talk radio. It included so much preaching that it became a hobby (listening to preachers ‘preach’). While tuning in one day, I became intrigued and attracted to one minister. He happened to have a church in my current city. I visited and immediately joined. I, not favoring a person’s race when it comes to relationships, found it easy to relate to this same race preacher. His stories were hilarious, applicable, easy to understand, and most importantly, biblically centered. As I grew, I heard and read many things that were challenging to my current lifestyle. Yes, I was a Christian, but giving up some of my most treasured and pleasurable sins were not comfortable, either was it easy. It had been made very clear to me that when I accepted Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, that a helper was included. The helper’s role was to give me the power and discretion to make and maintain decisions based on God’s way of thinking. Also, He would provide clarity without any misunderstanding. Knowing all this made my situation more mentally challenging. Half the time when I would make bad decisions, I clearly knew I was wrong. It simply ‘boiled down’ to… I did what I wanted to do. When approached by other believers about my choices, I defended what I last week was so strongly against. Confusion!

To this day, that hasn’t stopped. I have matured to not verbally defend my sins to others, but there’s still a mental war. Is this good or bad? Well, the bible doesn’t speak much on the matter. Maybe it’s fine. This week it’s good, next week it’s bad. One thing I do know, God has made sin crystal clear to his children that desire to please Him. Adam and Eve were created, but not controlled by God. As God provided direction then, he still does now. They were given the ability and right to have a free will, which is an easy way to identify someone’s love.

The deeper in love you become with a person; the more you freely sacrifice yourself and serve the other. Any good mommy or daddy can relate. You work, you clean, you wash clothes, you read books, and you pray, you comfort, you discipline, your share your bed, you wipe butts (literally), you pay… For what, a child who you continue to give and gave life. The baby/young child/teenager is clearly not able to do the same for you (anytime soon). However, you could care less. This is your child, who you are so deeply in love. These characteristics of love are very similar attributes of the same God I follow and serve. Whether you or your children realize it or not, you are blessed because someone sacrificially loves you.

It’s safe to say that the biggest gift your child could give is being a good representation of you. The joy which comes from a teacher, neighbor, or coach speaking well of your child fosters a healthy pride. Again, it’s probably safe to say, their behavior is a good reflection of their family’s lifestyle, which you help create and provide. Any behavior outside the norm of a family’s tradition brings shame and grief to the entire family. If there’s real love in the family, unhealthy behavior is abnormal and possibly a reflection of rebellion. Your children have the free will to act any way they desire, regardless of how much you love them. Experience teaches rules and guidelines do not promote and sustain healthy compliance. There must be willingness for the child to show love through obedience and a clear realization that bad choices demonstrate disrespect. Maturing in love takes time.

Showing love through obedience has become more of a reality to me with age. I have come to the conclusion, that love is defined by sacrifice and service. When my family is asked how they know daddy/husband loves them, the answer (for me) must be because of his sacrifice and service to me (specifically). As I grow in greater love for my family, I’m confident that will be the resolution (Matthew 23:11). The same goes for my relationship with the Lord. My love and better understanding of Him will help me serve and sacrifice more of myself. My indiscretions will become less and I will become a better representation of my family (John 14:15).

If you desire to be a part of a family, whose Father has already sacrificed and served you (John 15:13); accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. God has already and will continue serving you as a good father. However, it’s your responsibility to accept him as your daddy.

http://www.intouch.org/resources/all-things-are-new/content/topic/how_do_i_accept_jesus_as_my_savior_all_things

Rodney, the Whooping Stick

2011-10-17T00:50:00.005-05:00

As a kid, I was always consciously aware of my behavior. My parents were consistent in holding me accountable to my actions. If I was disobedient, I was properly dealt with. One junior high day during PE (physical education class), I verbally expressed my displeasures in my performance using ‘HELL’ as a reference. The PE teacher, already noticing a shift in my attitude, was bothered by my word and immediately directed me to the principle’s office. When I arrived, the principle contacted the PE teacher asking why I had been sent. He informed him that I used profanity. After hearing this, he directed me to the guidance counselor. While I was being transferred, I pleaded my case. I can remember expressing to the staff, “…all I said was ‘HELL’”. I knew that it was not appropriate, but come on… really. I heard much worse during gym class and simply couldn’t figure out the fuss over this casual spoken four-letter word.

When I entered the guidance counselor office, he sat me down and began his ‘spill’. I can’t quote verbatim what he said, but I do recall him informing me that my mom (who he knew) would be informed by phone. My main concern was “…tell her I said ‘HELL’ not that I was cursing”; however, I knew it didn’t matter. I was in trouble. Just as I didn’t want him to do, he did. Even now, I can emotionally connect to how upset I was about my behavior. My mother decided to drive (from work) to meet with me and the guidance counselor. While he spoke about the noticeable change in my attitude and my choice of words, I deeply concerned myself with the consequences of my actions. From that day forward, I was never disciplined again for using profanity. Now, I didn’t say I stopped using profanity… I simply discontinued speaking profane around authority.

Now, I’m a parent. I get the opportunity to scare the ‘crap’ out of my children, when they are disobedient or disrespectful. I take great pride in this role. As I know, my parent’s acts of love helped keep me out of much serious trouble as a child, teen, and adult. Obviously, I made a number of serious mistakes, but thankfully God’s grace along with my parent’s accountability established a positive outcome. This biblical formula is a promise which God has given all who choose to follow. The classic verse referred to disciplining children is Proverbs 13:24. Universally known as, ‘spare the rod, spoil the child’; however, the text actually reads ‘He who spares his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him promptly’ (NKJV).

As a young, childless adult, I wanted to spank everyone’s kid for ‘being bad’. The Wal-Mart trips with a kid ‘throwing a fit’ in the isle; because mommy wouldn’t buy them the latest, greatest toy encouraged this thought process. However, after becoming a dad, I quickly realized spanking as a disciplinary tool was not the resolution for every child behavior problem. What I understood as a child was respect for my parent’s authority. I knew that if I was non-compliant to given instructions that I would be disciplined. My mom didn’t ‘miss a beat’ (pun not intended). She was consistent as days become nights and nights become days. If she said this would happen if you disobey, then what she said would happen- happened. Sometimes, my harvest of disobedience included a spanking; other times, there were restrictions placed on my quality of life. This fear of being discipline and held accountable established great reverence for my parents. Today, if they attempted to physically spank me for my bad behavior; it would be slightly awkward. Although, if I were to be rightfully imprisoned… May the Lord have mercy on my conscious regarding the disappointment I would bring my parents. This alone would be my spanking.

About three Sundays ago, I overheard a childcare worker inform a mother that her daughter was hitting other children. The childcare worker encouraged the mom to teach her child that we should use our hands for loving, not hitting. I remembered hearing this before. This saying made such an impression on my wife and I that we purchased a big wooden spoon to use for disciplining instead of our hands. This wooden spoon has become the pun of many jokes and laughs amongst our children and us. He has become such a figure, that we gave him a name and a theme song. The theme song chorus goes a little something like this:

Rodney, the Whooping Stick- he’ll spank your butt for fun
when you get to acting up, here he comes…
Rodney, the Whooping Stick…
Rodney, the Whooping Stick!

Our children aren’t terribly afraid of Rodney. He typically hangs on the wall between their bedrooms. They are fully aware when he is insight, that it’s time to straighten up. I’m grateful for Rodney. He has become the bad guy. I say this, because I’m aware that some wrestle with holding their children accountable through disciplining. I am far from perfect, but using creative discipline methods have been equally successful and honor God in parenting. According to the bible, using your parental authority to promptly discipline your children shows your love. Do it. Then maybe, one day, like me; your child will look back on their life and be glad they had a parent that held them accountable at an early age. Strive to be someone your children respect. Not only when they’re children, but when they become socially and financially independent adults. This may be the lasting factor of maintaining a line of stability in your and their life.

I know this blog was not much about having a relationship with Jesus, but in many ways it is. God can help you be a more loving parent. According to the bible, the only way you can have a real connection with God is through Jesus Christ. Here’s another opportunity.

If you desire the power needed to truly change your life, accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior by clicking on the link below.

http://www.intouch.org/resources/all-things-are-new/content/topic/how_do_i_accept_jesus_as_my_savior_all_things

Much More

2011-09-30T02:22:00.004-05:00

The month of September was an extremely busy month including a vacation with my wife, celebrating 35 completed years of life, new clients, new job, etc. It was a month of reflecting how blessed I am. Many things, I witnessed and read, provided me with a ‘matter of perspective’. The value of my life and making the most of every opportunity was at the forefront of my mind. Of course, there were some down periods that were exhausting such as typical work-related challenges, children behavior issues, and additional work days. However, ‘Life is good!’ My wife and kids are healthy, alive, and joyful. What more could I ask for? Well, quite honestly… a lot more.

I read that poverty continues to rise in the US. The economy or healthcare is not improving. While vacationing two west coast cities, I saw this first hand. There were several homeless men and women begging for money and acting out in a drunken stupor or from side effects of a street drug. Regardless of their reasons for being in this predicament, seeing them made it real to me. Fortunately (unfortunately?), I live in the rural area of a city. The likelihood of my family or I witnessing the homeless is extremely rare. Some would consider this a blessing, others would not. I’m still in the deciding phase.

How do we begin to correct the many major issues facing our country? I am somewhat clueless. To say, Jesus is the answer is cliché; although, I believe it to be true. There are so many ways to communicate how my life has improved because of accepting God’s way of salvation and abundant life, but what good is this for those struggling. Everyone processes someone’s life story differently. Some critique by proclaiming the ‘silver spoon’ treatment was given, while others instantly connect and grab hold of the possibilities and conditional Promises. Figuring out how to effectively minister to a certain population can be physically and mentally exhausting. Therefore, I’m grateful in knowing that being me through Christ is His way. This truly is liberating.

With this said, I believe, the way that we start tackling some of our country’s problem is by examining ourself. Face your issues and seek help to solve. Then, move on to your immediate family (your husband/wife and kids), parents, siblings, and friendships to your place of employment. Focus on making all these relationships right based on God’s biblical principles. Get a solid grip on life by attaining and focusing on family fundamentals. American history provides examples of too many fallen politicians and Christian ministers who set out to change the world, while their own family and work life was unstable.

Similar to being successful in a team sport, one must focus on the fundamentals before attempting to throw a 60 yard touchdown, dunk a basketball, or hit a home run. As a former team sport athlete, there’s nothing worse than playing with someone (or being the guy) who thinks they are capable, when they clearly are not. Their lack of development and inability to accept their current status always adversely affected the entire team. The same principle applies to each citizen of this country. Do your part first in ‘getting yourself together’! Allow the Bible to be your blueprint for life. Understand and fulfill your role in improving your family, community, and work life.

If you desire the power needed to truly change your life, accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior by clicking on the link below.

http://www.intouch.org/resources/all-things-are-new/content/topic/how_do_i_accept_jesus_as_my_savior_all_things

The Ultimate Preventable Disease

2011-08-30T04:15:00.004-05:00

I just recently read an article that projected that by 2030 that half of the United States of America adult population will be obese. That is so disappointing, because it’s something we can control. Some articles have even proclaimed obesity as being the number one killer of Americans. Simply ‘Google’ obesity and it’s relation to preventable diseases; one will see the direct correlation. The fact that it’s preventable gives us the right to either accept or reject it. Each individual has the freedom to choose. As obesity is only one killer of our bodies, there are so many other allowed avenues of destructive access.

One of the great characteristics of God is the freedom he has given us to decide. As you will hear most preachers say, “He is a gentleman” in his delivery of the Gospel. From my own personal experience, I was never ‘beat over the head’ with his message. Sure there were occasional fire and brimstone messages, but for the most case, it was tenderly conveyed. Through trials and errors, no matter how much I rejected Him; the initial pain due to my opposite choices of his plan were delicate. The immediate consequences were not severe enough to discontinue my rebellious and (spiritually) life threatening behavior. However, if you have read my past blogs, you are familiar with some of the consequences of my disobedience. The sowing of my seeds harvested a fruit, which I didn’t desire to digest. Unfortunately, I had to chew and swallow some. Thankfully, God’s grace was sufficient in allowing a way of escape.

It’s somewhat surreal (now) looking back realizing how silly I was to hold on. I honestly knew that I was slowly desensitizing myself to Godly things. My lifestyle was a direct reflection of my mentality and way of life. I constantly felt out of place in the presence of those who ‘acted’ as I ‘acted’. It was very plain and simple, that life couldn’t healthy continue down this path.

My junior year in college, a girl invited me to a bible study in her dorm. I attended. The college minister spoke. My eyes watered ‘dang near’ the entirety of his message. At completion, he approached me to inquire. I simply informed him that I was not ready. I went back to doing life, as I preferred. Thinking about that, now, is really heartbreaking. Thankfully, I didn’t make any major decisions from this time to the time I gave my heart to God, that drastically traumatized my life. It could have happened, but once again, God’s grace was sufficient.

Obesity is a disease that can be considered a silent killer. However, a person who is obese is easily identified. Most people believe it not to be politically correct to call someone overweight, “fat”. The watering down of America’s culture not to ‘call something what it is’ enables ALL of us with issues to continue having issues (my opinion). This similar approach applies to communicating with people living contrary to God’s way. Sin is a silent killer of our spiritual life. It disconnects us from a holy God. Unfortunately, unlike obesity, sin is not simply recognized by everyone. If you are unfamiliar with God’s word, there is no way you may be aware that you are committing violations to His commandments.

In my role as a personal trainer, I initially discuss with client’s their goals. For most, it’s to lose weight. A body fat percentage test is conducted, which requires measurements of 4 to 7 different sites on a person’s body. The layers of fat directly under the skin entered into an equation offer an approximate measurement of an individual’s pounds of body fat. This percentage determines if you are overweight or obese. If a client is obese, it is my responsibility to tell the potential client of the many preventable diseases connected to having more than 25% body fat for males and 30% body fat for females. Also, they are informed with proper exercise and diet; changes can be made. No one forces them to exercise and eat right. They have a decision that has to be made based on the data which was given.

Similar to me fulfilling duties in my vocational role, God (Holy Spirit) conducts a series of tests. There’s come a point in every woman and man’s life were spiritual guidance is needed. In this case, God finds an avenue to communicate his love to you. Today, his form of communication would be this blog. Your spirit feels an emotional tug like ‘He’s talking to me’. Correlations to your present spiritual state are connected with your future. After you evaluate your potential outcome, you are offered an option for a life of salvation and abundance (John 10:10). God doesn’t force the decision to choose his way of life. It’s your choice.

It’s sad to think that something that we (America) could physically and spiritually prevent may ultimately destroy us. God in his immeasurable love allows us free will to make a choice. With this freedom, human beings have historically rejected his simple wisdom; however, God has never changed his character. As I would encourage a potential client to workout and eat better, I’m encouraging you… choose Jesus! It truly is the better way. Do not be deceived, God will not be mocked (Galatians 6:7). Every knee will one day bow and confess Jesus Christ is King of King and Lord of Lords (Isaiah 45:23). Whether you do it ‘now or later’ is your choice.

If you desire to choose Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

Getting pass the Past

2011-08-08T14:03:00.026-05:00

Winters in the Midwest can be extremely cold. During a Christmas season of the early 90’s, I decided to wear a Santa Claus hat instead of a beanie to keep my head warm. While being hosted as visitors at an opposing school, one of my teammates overhead a heckler call me, ‘Santa Coon’. I snickered at the name calling, as it was extremely creative and quite witty, but couldn’t help to be bothered by the racism. Before this incident took place, my father had discussed with me racist names that I may possibly hear. Coon was briefly mentioned. I recall laughing when this term was spoken by him. It made no sense to my childish mind why this would be offensive; however, I became extremely upset when targeted as one. This was my first memorable encounter with direct racism.

My first year of graduate school, I dated a white girl who grew up in the Southwest region of the United States. Her high school boyfriend was Hispanic and according to her, he was well accepted by her parents. However, when they discovered their 19 year old daughter was dating an African American, she received a letter in the mail. The note informed her that if she continued to date “A BLACK”, that she would no longer receive any financial assistance for college. I sincerely couldn’t believe her parent’s level of racist audacity and distaste and degrading of a darker class of people. This was my second memorable encounter with direct racism.

I allowed the direct and indirect episodes to take its toll on my (already limited supply of) self-confidence. In time, I chose to use the adversity as motivation to achieve the mockers’ definition of success. Rejection was my fuel. The pursuit of worldly security became an aim. However, my ‘I’ll show them’ attitude proved unhealthy. The harder I worked, the more I ‘sold-out’ to something I quite frankly could care less. My pursuit to prove became the subtle ‘chase of being accepted’. I became a prisoner to what I failed to release. Other’s acceptance was symbolic bars to my self-created prison cell. In order to be free, I had to make a conscious decision to let go of the past remarks and hatred. The process of self-acceptance began.

Discovering what really made me happy, while aligning it to God’s will was painful. A career personality test directed me towards service jobs such as a coach or clergy. My disappointment was the earning potential and the common culture connection to these job titles. I allowed this possible forecast stereotype to distant me from what I enjoyed. The past rejection of ‘not being enough’ along with discovering my talents were a consistent internal struggle. My desire to win this invisible battle was getting the best of me. I discovered no level of success could ever help me attain acceptance by those who prejudged me for uncontrollable reasons.

Accepting myself and God’s will enhanced my Christian faith. Living a Christian lifestyle involves a certain amount of rejection. Although, this is for reasons you can control. In accepting Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior and practicing His teachings, you can expect for some to consider you ‘a little squirrelly’. Choosing not to completely obey God in certain areas, due to fear of rejection is common. The more radical you become about your faith, the more isolation you can expect from the world. It is safe to say my experiences with racism has better prepared me for His future (Romans 8:28). Permitting self-acceptance and forgiveness has been linked to more radical living for Jesus Christ.

If you chose this Life, your feelings will be hurt. You will be judged by the actions of those who came before you claiming the same Name. All the life experiences of the person God calls you to minister will be projected on to you. Assumptions and stereotypes, which may be out of your control, will be associated with you when claiming the Christian faith. Expect it. However, remember that God has given you power to love… power to have self-discipline to live a Christian life (2 Timothy 1:7), no matter anyone’s view or judgment. God has promised that this Power will eventually win the battle (Philippians 2:1-11). You simply ‘stay the course’ and remain faithful in professing and living like Jesus Christ is Lord! He will fight all your battles for you.

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

Innocent Bystander?

2011-07-19T07:40:00.014-05:00

My relationship with my high school sweetheart was an emotional ‘roller coaster ride’. From my senior year in high school to my senior year in college, we dated and briefly cohabitated. What started out as fun quickly turned into an obviously emotionally and mentally damaging union. After approximately 1 year of dating, I began cheating. I had no cares or thoughts of how my activities were adversely affecting her (or me). One time, a friend informed her of my illicit behavior. When I was confronted, I bluntly denied. My braggadocios ways were gratifying my immediate needs. I was an overconfident and blindly under-achieving kid with selfish and boyish intentions. This behavior wasn’t taught, but was the norm in my environment. I truly didn’t set out to be a bad guy, but allowed it. The experience wounded my self-worth, desensitized my faith in God, and lowered my class level. I was aware that my actions could lead to more serious consequences, but choose to disregard the potential risks. Today, if I was to have the same ignore-ant approach, it would prove detrimental to not only me, but my family.

When God created Adam, he was placed in a thriving environment with few recorded guidelines. The one most remembered is God’s commandment to Adam (before Eve existed) not to eat from a specific tree (Genesis 2:16-17). God’s biblical purpose in positioning Adam in this new land was to maintain it (Genesis 2:15). After these instructions were given and Adam completed his initial assignments, God created a woman to offer help and companionship. Within a short period, Satan decided to mentally attack her by challenging God’s ultimate commandment. Eventually his craftiness overwhelmed Eve to yield and disobey God. After a bite was taken, she passed the fruit to Adam. (Genesis 3:6). Once the realization set, they hid from God and each other. God summoned Adam’s whereabouts discovering him clothed. Quickly realizing Adam’s newfound ‘wisdom’, He asked for an explanation. Instead of Adam offering his wrong doings, he responded claiming Eve as the primary blame for his bad choice (Genesis 3:12).

Today, the same ‘blame shifting’ takes place. God has given all men clear instructions to be overall leaders of their families (Genesis 3:16). I have witnessed many men who’ve allowed Satan to destroy their families and ultimately, their future. Like Adam, men have been called to have dominion, while being fruitful and multiplying (Genesis 1:26, 28). No matter your interpretation of this scripture, the common demonstration of most modern day marriages and families are not a good representation of God’s purpose. If men chose not to lead their own family, how is it possible for him to fully experience God’s will to dominate, multiply, and be fruitful? When Adam choose to be a quiet bystander instead of a verbal and physical protector of his wife and future, the results were costly. Am I saying it was completely Adam’s fault? Absolutely not; however, it’s worth noting that he was present when Eve made this significant mistake. Whether, it be right or wrong; I challenge myself to accept the responsibility for the decisions of my wife and children. It is a husband’s and father’s job to place his wife and children in an environment conducive to having a healthy relationship with God, which promotes a healthy, biblical response to life (Ephesians 6:4, 1 Timothy 3: 2,12). Although, this may not guarantee a biblical response; it will increase the chances for wisdom and discernment.

The current status of the American family is a direct reflection of men not accepting their overall godly position. This passive aggressive approach has caused many women to function in unnatural and quite stressful roles. Choosing to be like Adam by not interfering when our ‘helper’ is confronted with the world’s deceit is not acceptable. It places women and children in roles, which God hasn’t willed. God has anointed men to lead, not to watch their family. Spectators watch and wonder what will happen next. Not tapping into this divine gift of leadership has proven to be a travesty. Failing our children, wives, and mothers (including mother of our children) has lead us in the wrong direction. The bible is filled with disasters starting with a man choosing sins of omission (failing to do what is commanded). If you have fell victim to being passive in godly leadership, please take heed of Adam’s example during his moment of meekness.

The sad truth of my past is recognizing just how lost I was. Being timid in pursuing Jesus Christ increased my unawareness for those who were closest to me. In a conversation years after our break up, my ex disclosed a very serious matter she endured during our relationship. During the entirety of our union, I was clueless. In discovering, I was ashamed to not have helped. The same can happen to anyone choosing not to be active in their love one’s life. Involving yourself to the point of caring, probing, and defending is needed to avoid receiving this type of news. Fulfill the command of God to multiply, be fruitful, and dominate, but first remember, you must protect the ones you love (Titus 1:6-9).

If you would like to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

Doing Life!

2011-06-25T11:07:00.006-05:00

I’m so appreciative of all the wonderful blessings that come along with serving the Lord with words and actions. A healthy mind, body, spirit, family, and life outlook is good for my soul. As my family continues to thrive and grow, we count the many blessings and few hardships we’ve endured. At this very moment, we are ‘rolling along’. It’s a stable and relaxing season. Unfortunately, the beginning of the year did not begin this way.

February 2011 was, by far, the most difficult month of my life. I underwent a surgery that kept me away from work for 11 weeks. In the first two weeks, I was unable to walk a few steps without pain and strongly relied on ‘pain killers’ for physical comfort. The healing process was crazy painful and unpleasant (to say the least). During my major recovery time, I had two unplanned hospital stays; one time for three days and the other for five days. My mother and mother-in-law visited to help my wife with the children; while she juggled hospital cots to hospital staff. ‘To sum it all up’, it was a really bad experience for us.

Initially, I dealt well with the expected pain; however, the continuous days of discomfort ‘ran its course’. I seriously became somewhat depressed and obnoxiously pessimistic. My wife attempted to console me with scripture, physical and emotional affection, etc. I simply would not allow it to work for me any longer. I allowed my temporary inability to perform normal functions (which I clearly took for granted) take me mentally and spiritually to a place where I hadn’t been for awhile. Speaking of hope for full recovery was challenging. Although, I did not endure the trials which some face during suffering; I could clearly relate to how Job must have felt during his time of turmoil.

According to the Bible, Job was a very prosperous and upright man. He was fervently obedient to God to the extreme of repenting for his children’s possible sins. Job was acknowledged as ‘the greatest of all the people…’ during his time. God was so proud of Job that during one of Satan’s visits; God acknowledged Job’s character. This prompted Satan to allude that Job was obedient due to his prosperity. God, then, granted him limited to full access to Job. During this season, Job’s possessions and family were destroyed and his body was filled with disease and pain. Job was spiritually challenged wondering why he suffered; exclaiming that he had committed no sin worthy of this cause. His wife attempted to plant seeds in his mind to curse God and die; however, Job did not. He did question the Lord regarding his condition to finally receive an answer from God in the form of questions (rhetorical questioning, at that). Once God completed his lecture, Job openly repented in disgust towards his challenging of God’s authority. After he repented, God blessed him twice as much as he had before making for a happy ending to ‘not-so’ happy story. (Job)

First and foremost, based on what the Bible speaks of Job, I’m not near his level of faith and obedience. That is not the message that I’m attempting to convey. Job is a prime example of a good man, who loved the Lord, who happened to experience bad misfortune. The bible doesn’t claim that he had done anything wrong worthy of this trial. If anything, his reverence for God placed him in this ‘testing’ situation.

Christianity is a faith based religion. You do not accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior without faith. It’s spiritually, mentally, and physically impossible. In order to be saved, you must believe that He was the last and only sacrifice for your past and future sins. You must believe and accept that He lived, and then died for your sins. You must choose to follow God’s instructions, as Christ did while on earth, regardless of your situation. For this is what it means to truly be a Christian (child of God). To believe and act in obedience to all of God’s commandments takes faith. The benefit of this type of faith is… it’s the same faith which will carry you through chaos eventually leading to a blessed and prosperous life. Without a doubt, this is one of the many advantages in believing in a God that has given you a Way to have direct access to Him.

Four months since my surgery, I’m ‘back in the saddle’ on a continuous road to full recovery (including spiritual and mental). As God doubled Job’s portion, I believe, he has done the same for me. I’m now better able to mentally connect with those who have physical limitations. The career opportunities that existed before my operation did not fade, but stayed. My quality of life and appreciation for family, friends, and neighbors has skyrocketed. My life did temporarily change, but the overall view and reality of my Christian life never did. God was still in control and my relationship with Him through acts and words supported me. I questioned the reason for the suffering, but never have I questioned the reason for the blessing. I clearly know why I’m blessed. I clearly know why I have the favor of God. Like Job, it’s not because of my earthly works, but because of the promises of God. It’s because I have chosen His way. The seasons of life may change, but thankfully God never will. He promises. (Deuteronomy 30: 11-20)

If you would like to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

Stop mocking me!

2011-05-13T16:24:00.008-05:00

My wife and I were being playfully silly the other day, while driving to pickup a pizza. Our two children, ages 9 and 3, were in the backseat entertaining themselves. I’m not quite sure what my wife and I were talking about that was so funny, but I burst out with laughter. After I stopped giggling, we continued our discussion. Within minutes, we noticed our children laughing out loud. Of course, we tuned in to see what was so funny. My 3 year old decided that he would imitate my laugh. We all thought this hilarious, that a toddler without encouragement would choose to make fun of his dad’s laugh. A few days after the incident, I found myself listening to how I sounded when I genuinely laughed. First, I noticed that my toddler did a really good job of mocking me. Second, I realized that my mannerisms and tone were very similar to my dad’s.

As far as I can remember, my father was always working. There were no off days. His full-time job was with a major railroad company, while part-time… he worked odd jobs to earn additional income. From cutting wood to hauling hay, my dad gave meaning to the street term of ‘hustle’. This left little time for involvement in my childhood activities, as it was not a necessity for surviving. My father became a dad at the age of 18. He and my mom were college students with nothing, when I came into this world. I never knew the seriousness of their struggle until one day while in my hometown visiting, we surfed through television channels. We came across ‘The Pursuit of Happyness’. I asked my dad, if he had ever seen it, hoping he hadn’t… so we could watch it. He stated that he had, but had a hard time completing it, because of its similarity to his own life. This sparked my interest, so I inquired. My mom happened to be in the room when I asked questions, so they (both) briefly shared their beginnings. I was somewhat amazed they initially struggled so badly financially. After hearing the story and ‘connecting the pieces’, I better understood why my dad consistently worked so hard in his younger adult years.

Although, my dad wasn’t present for all my tee ball or basketball games, he did make time to involve me in his life. Starting in my pre-teen years, I became heavily involved with his odd jobs. Working with a group of adult-aged blue collar men encouraged me to stay in close proximity to my father. During these limited times, I unconsciously picked up many of his characteristics and ethics. Little did I (or he, I believe) know, how his impression as a provider would affect my life. King Solomon experienced the same. His father, David passed on some of his traits. Although, David was a man that had a heart which pleased God; he fell prey to adultery. Solomon was conceived from this experience (2 Samuel 11). Throughout Solomon’s adult life, he obviously was not content with his wife (or wives) leading him to having several wives. In this pursuit, his conquest would lead him to turning away from God in his old age (1 Kings 11:1-4). Whereas, David choose to fall for another man’s wife; Solomon surpassed his father’s transgression by marrying several women who were not part of God’s will for his life.

It’s safe to say that children do not always know what is best for them. As an adult, you know that eating an entire cake as one meal is bad for your health. Most toddlers are not aware of food’s health benefits. Serving them only baked dessert for dinner may be a dream come true. Generally speaking, their concern in devouring a meal is not nutritional, but enjoyment. What is good in moderation is typically not healthy in excess. In David’s case, his sin of adultery possibly provided an opportunity for his son to excuse himself towards his selection of and appetite for women. No parent should have to mentally debate whether their actions led to their child’s demise. The opportunity to ‘do what you want to do because you’re grown’ is plentiful. Just know that your actions are seeds being planted in the mind of your children. It’s amazing to think that one corn kernel can produce enough cobs to feed a family. The same principle applies in regards to influencing your children. A parent consistently opposing to God’s will is the fertilization of future sins your children may commit. There are many stories in the bible and world that demonstrate this throughout the history of man. It started with Adam and Eve’s bad decision, and then manifested itself into all the God opposing traits our world experiences today.

I’m by far am NOT the perfect model of a father. Unfortunately, my children will have to make their own decisions about the error of their dad’s ways. My prayer is that God will gracefully allow me time to not adversely affect my children’s spiritual walk. I humbly ask the Lord to help me live the life He has called me to live to eliminate any opportunity for generational curses. I believe everyone should do the same. Your areas of deficit that causes anxiety when mentioned will bother you more if you allow it to carry over to your children. ‘Get a hold’ of your moral by allowing the One who has the power to truly change you into your heart. Trust me; He can change your life. It’s only too late if you are not living. Even if you are older with teenage or adult children, the servant attitude of Jesus Christ (Matthew 20:28) IS the greatest example that you can provide for your children.

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

Read a past and similar blog posted on 5.7.10 http://theseminarydropout.blogspot.com/2010/05/your-child-marries-you.html

So close, Pt. 2

2011-05-01T08:07:00.006-05:00

In one of my unsuccessful dating attempts, I became upset about an abrupt break of communication. While expressing these happenings to my neighbor, she ridiculed me for pursuing this girl. It really upset me to the point of not wanting to speak with her anymore. There were past occasions which I could have mocked her for bad choices; however, I never did. So, I thought her initial reaction was immature and unfair. In our next few conversations, I choose to be distant and superficial. Within a week or so, I received a sincere apology by email. I distinctly remember how appreciative I was for this simple act of kindness and humility. A genuine ‘sorry’ from an offensive action, that wasn’t relayed as insulting, meant much (Proverbs 15:1). Her modesty and continuous maturity helped open my heart for more of what God had in store.

As we both desired the same in a committed relationship, our wishes unknowingly drew us closer. My reservations and prejudices deteriorated as my neighbor shared her story. In her actions and words regarding her son and son’s biological father, I saw wisdom. I watched her deal with the distant and recent past by seeking the Lord through church attendance and Christian fellowship. There was no bitterness about the past, but hope for the well-being of her child. This, I must say, was extremely mature and attractive for someone of her age. I was being presented with an opportunity.

As I had always expressed to my neighbor, that she should never date anyone who didn’t’ desire to be a dad; I was unsure of my future in this role. I always felt uncomfortable around little kids (still do to this day); however, I knew that this was an opportunity that if not accepted would be greatly regretted. I fearfully, cautiously, and prayerfully took the ‘plunge’. Within a month, we grew significantly closer and realized that we did have much more in common. The little guy did provide some challenges, but my neighbor trusted and allowed me to father. Her permission to share parental authority frightened her, but her faith in her new boyfriend proved worthwhile. One day, while Bryce, her, and I watched television, they fell asleep (as they both so easily do). As they slept, I felt the need to pray about my new role. God revealed to me, during this time, that my future wife and son were lying in my bed. My love rapidly grew for them and eventually we married. Who would have ever imagined that God’s gift of marriage for me would include a child? I did not.

The purpose of me telling this story is to acknowledge a significant time in my life that I was fearful, yet acted in faith after a godly revelation. There were plenty of opportunities for me to be doubtful. From my wife’s and I friends, family, and co-workers questioning our dating relationship to fears of the unknown, I could have justifiably not accepted the challenge. Fear of becoming a father or the possibility of dealing with another man in my marriage was my initial concern. However, I did not allow this fear to discontinue our relationship and thank God that I didn’t. As I truly believe, that my wife and oldest son have blessed me in ways that I will never be able to repay them. The Lord was sure of what I needed and in (both of us) seeking Him, He provided a good gift for an unmet and natural desire. As the rainbow was to Noah (Genesis 9:8-17), my wife is to me a symbol of God’s faithfulness and trustworthiness. With all this said, I still must confess that I do not completely trust Him.

In reading stories of the grumbling, disobedient, and fearful Old Testament Israelites, I use to be in awe with disbelief that after all the miracles witness; they could be so blind. Now, I realize that I’m similar in so many ways. Day after day, I witness God’s reliability yet I ask for signs and wonders in my areas of disbelief. This shouldn’t be. The reality is my faith is weak. I have grown, but I have not arrived. As God revealed to me in prayer about my future as a husband and father, He has also revealed other promises. In several ways, I’ve allowed the cares of this world to stagnate me from growing deeper in obedience and ministry. God’s word says one gains faith by hearing the Word of God (Romans 10:17). With this said, I know that I’m ‘so close’ to making a move which will make people talk, as they did the day we announced our marital plans. It excites me.

The relevance to you is this… God will speak to you, if you seek His will. Having the courage to fulfill His will is a ‘different story’ (Numbers 13). There are many people who know what they should do, but they are not doing. Like me, their faith is weak and they need to continually hear or read the Word of God (Bible). As we grow in our understanding of God’s will (which is His Word), we will begin to fulfill purpose in unconventional ways. As your belief in God grows, being obedient to His unction will become involuntary. You realize there’s eventual blessings connected to your behavior. Please understand my heart in expressing my own short comings. I believe you are ‘so close’ to attaining a gift God has for you. The hold up may simply be a matter of your complete submergence into His will. As my marriage was for me, it will take you first to give in order to get. Allow my irregular beginning to a joyful life as a husband and father inspire you to believing that God is able to bless you in unusual ways. Remember, it first starts with you asking, seeking, and knocking (Matthew 7:7) on His provided doors of opportunity.

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

So close, Pt. 1

2011-04-21T12:11:00.007-05:00

After dropping out of seminary, I moved back to Amarillo, Texas to live with my best friend and his mother. Within 3 months, he and I decided to get an apartment. When we moved into our apartment, one of our neighbors was a single mother of an infant ‘Keebler-elfish’ looking boy named Bryce. My roommate knew her, as they use to work with each other at a restaurant. As matter of fact, he stated that she use to flirt with him and he with her. Also, he warned me to be careful around her. There was nothing horrible particular that he said about her; however, his discernment from what he knew of her and I obviously made him uncomfortable.

As months passed, my new neighbor and I periodically chatted outside. Typically, when I would get my mail; she was on her balcony talking on the phone or playing with her son. The longer I lived by her, the more I was aware that I was physically attracted to her. So I became even more careful. In the back of my mind, I knew my roommate, whom opinion I held in high regard, didn’t trust her. My prior dealings with dating relationships encouraged me to trust the discernment of a close Christian friend (Proverbs 27:17). In my visits with my neighbor, my friend’s inclination was unfortunately confirmed. As, there were several ‘red flags’. Initially, I told myself that I would never date a single mother for all the worldly reasons most men claim; but with the brief interactions, it became apparent that we were unequally yoked (2 Corinthians 6:14) in several areas. Although, the longer I lived as her neighbor, the harder it became to consistently guard my heart (Proverbs 4:23).

Time allowed for our relationship to grow, while we individually matured. After a year or so, she became the ‘go-to’ girl in discussing my casual dating relationships, as I to her. One of my primary concerns for her was dating anyone who didn’t desire to be a dad to her son. Telling her this, while remaining unbiased was surprisingly easy. Due to her being a single mother, I didn’t ever cross the friendship line by kissing her or becoming intimately physical. This (I must say) was very uncommon for me during that stage in my life to a woman whom I found physically and emotionally attractive. The fear of emotionally abandoning her and her son, if the dating relationship failed, haunted me. Thankfully, this was the additional motivation I needed to stay pure in my relationship with her, which really allowed us to become/be friends.

After completing graduate school, I decided that I would actively pursue a wife. I was ready to love the way God intended a man to love (Ephesians 5:25). This drove me to begin heavily praying for a wife, which caused my relationship with God to grow. In hindsight, it’s apparent that my heart became more open to God’s way of blessing. The dating scene was not for me. I was greatly unsuccessful. In a 6 month period, I pursued three women. Needless to say, none valued what I valued; therefore, I always felt unappreciated (they may have felt the same). During these frustrating times, I would speak with my neighbor and it became evident that she truly appreciated what I had to offer. Her valuing me opened the door for me to sincerely value her. My neighbor had begun spiritually pursuing the same path. This allowed us to emotionally and spiritually connect in undeniable ways.

Beat Cairo!

2011-03-23T13:58:00.007-05:00

Every year around this basketball craze time known as March Madness, I have this particular numbing feeling about my past. Growing up in small town in Southern Illinois, high school basketball was extremely important and popular. It was (is) similar to high school football in rural Texas, which inspired the movie and television series, Friday Night Lights. With there not being much for entertainment, sports in small towns provide a sense of entertainment, worth, and ownership. As a child and teenager, I subliminally and quickly learned in order to be noticed, basketball was the stage.

My freshman year in high school was fortunate. I was part of a great varsity basketball team that won many games and was filled with extremely talented players. The competition from junior high to varsity basketball in one year provided many learning opportunities. As a junior high athlete, our basketball team only lost one game during our eighth grade season. Unfortunately, it was in the state tournament causing us to play in a consolation round earning third place. Going into high school, our young team didn’t know or ever expect to lose; we were clearly winners.

As in most metropolitan or rural areas, there’s consistently a dominant team. Whether it is baseball, football, basketball, etc. - everyone knows who’s good in ‘what’. This sets the expectations for matchups and favorites to win. In my high school basketball days, the Cairo Pilots were the team to beat. In junior high, I did not know this. I may have heard it from my father and his friends, but no impression was made. High school was a different story. When our team faced Cairo, there was a sense of uncertainty. The disbelief of a victory was evident. No matter how great our season accomplishments; our team always had to beat Cairo to proceed any further. The fear of a season ending due to a playoff loss to Cairo was the ‘elephant in a room’. No one would say aloud that it would end this way, but three of my four high school years unfortunately did. Our town’s mentality of Cairo carried over to our court performance. As talented as we were, from our sophomore to senior year, we never defeated the Pilots.

In the old testament, God promised his chosen people, the Israelites, their own land after releasing them from Egyptian slavery. His grace and plan for His people extended beyond their belief system. Based on scripture, it’s safe to say that the Israelites found it hard to internalize their future. Their consistent complaining and disobedience seems almost surreal when reading about their journey. God consistently revealed himself in many ways which should have established an undying faith in His ability and love. Unfortunately, this was not the case. They allowed their past experiences to adversely affect their future. When there time came for them to explore the Promised Land, they failed miserably by reporting the challenges instead of the opportunity. Due to their disbelief, the bible states that God didn’t allow the older generation to inherit His promise (Deuteronomy 1). In reading the entire book of Numbers, it’s clear that God is faithful, graceful, and merciful. However, no matter His attributes; His chosen people still fell short in believing His promises. Their opportunity to receive God’s gift had arrived and passed not because of God’s inability but because of their disbelief and fear.

Obviously, one of the biggest regrets I have as an athlete is never beating the ‘Pilots’. As an adult, I realize what my high school team’s belief in its God given ability to win and winning could have done for my small town and its future mentality. Similar to the Israelites, I only saw the obstacles we faced; however, now, I see the opportunity. Like the unfaithful generation described above, I’m arguably convinced that we missed our chance due to similar characteristics (disbelief and fear).

Today, one of the greatest motivations I have in making my life count is reflecting on my past. Unfortunately, I believe we all have missed opportunities. There are not too many adults whom I have deep conversations, which do not express a past regret and its effects on their life. As human beings, we mostly do our best to ‘make the best’ out of life current situations. Fortunately for us all, God is a redeemer and for those who love the Lord (John 14:15), he has promised to work out all things for good (Romans 8:28). The bible has provided us with many examples of God’s grace. Today, His grace still lives and thrives in our everyday culture. As individuals, we all must confess that we fall short of the glory of God (Romans 3:23). Fortunately for us, God has made a way of escape through the acceptance of Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. God’s promises do not start without accepting His plan. You can read the bible all you desire, while quoting and shouting scriptures over your situation. Without the acceptance and following of Jesus Christ, your situation is voided, due to your initial disbelief. One day, the opportunity to ‘beat Cairo’ and ‘enter the Promised Land’ will pass. During your NOW moment, you have to accept His plan for your life. It all begins with accepting His son, Jesus Christ. If you have already done this, then there are other things in your life that you must face. God desires us to continue growing and becoming more like Him. The whole purpose of this abundant life He promises is not looking back and having regrets. I want us all to accept God’s best for our life.

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

Ouch, but Thank You!

2011-02-16T22:05:00.007-06:00

It's 10:56 PM and I am currently taking a sitz bath, while my wife types this blog. One of the things I fear the most has come upon me, on February 11^th, I had a hemorrhoidectomy. Over the last 10 years I have "successfully" managed my hemorrhoids with the hopes and fears to not have surgery. It was more fears that kept me from getting the surgery done when needed. Needless to say, I finally had to have the surgery.

Over the last 5 days, I have been for the most part, bedridden. I am a very active guy and being in the bed and the house (days on) is comparable to being in prison. The post-op pain has been unbearable at times, but for the most part tolerable and typical. The most humbling part is the unexplainable and painful bowel movements which require my wife's assistance. I tell you this all, not for you to feel sorry for me, but to be transparent as usual.

These five days have given me time to do a lot of thinking. Some of the things that I have thought about are a few of the most recent family deaths and the emotions it caused loved ones. Over the last 3 years, my mother-in-law has lost her parents to cancer. One of the things I continue to consider is the endured pain when they knew that they were not going to fully recover. Also, I think about my mother-in-laws emotions as she watched her mother and father suffer. As ashamed as I am to say, I really didn't understand then, like I do now, what it's like to be desperate and in pain plus watching somebody you love sustain a season of pain.

Through this recovery time, I feel that God is teaching me valuable lessons. A few of course I have already aforementioned, but the others have not quite come so clear. Pain has a way of making you internalize what is really going on with you emotionally, physically, and spiritually. It pulls things out of you that need to be ‘said and done’. I hope that in this time of recovery I will grow significantly closer to the Lord. As a matter of fact, I know I will.

I hope that this brief, abnormal "Seminary DropOut'" blog will encourage you to deal with those things that need to be ‘said and done’. Calling on the name of Jesus and simply speaking his name repetitively has literally brought comfort to my body. When the pain is so bad and you don't have a clue what to do, call on the name of the Lord Jesus Christ. He will comfort you, He will teach you, and He will give you the insight needing to stand.

I ask for your prayers in this time of recovery and I ask that you will rejoice with me knowing the revelation that God is my source of healing and restoration. There is one passage that I want to post that has given me hope in this time. May God bless you!

Isaiah 58

True and False Fasting

¹"Cry aloud; do not hold back;
^(A) lift up your voice like a trumpet;
^(B) declare to my people their transgression,
to the house of Jacob their sins.
²^(C) Yet they seek me daily
and delight to know my ways,
as if they were a nation that did righteousness
and did not forsake the judgment of their God;
they ask of me righteous judgments;
they delight to draw near to God.
³^(D) 'Why have we fasted, and you see it not?
Why have we humbled ourselves, and you take no knowledge of it?'
Behold, in the day of your fast you seek your own pleasure,^[a]
^(E) and oppress all your workers.
⁴Behold, you fast only to quarrel and to fight
and to hit with a wicked fist.
Fasting like yours this day
will not make your voice to be heard on high.
⁵^(F) Is such the fast that I choose,
^(G) a day for a person to humble himself?
Is it to bow down his head like a reed,
and to spread sackcloth and ashes under him?
Will you call this a fast,
and a day acceptable to the LORD?

⁶"Is not this the fast that I choose:
^(H) to loose the bonds of wickedness,
to undo the straps^(I) of the yoke,
to let the oppressed^[b] go free,
and to break every yoke?
⁷Is it not^(J) to share your bread with the hungry
and bring the homeless poor into your house;
when you see the naked, to cover him,
^(K) and not to hide yourself from your own flesh?
⁸^(L) Then shall your light break forth like the dawn,
^(M) and your healing shall spring up speedily;
^(N) your righteousness shall go before you;
^(O) the glory of the LORD shall be your rear guard.
⁹Then you shall call, and the LORD will answer;
you shall cry, and he will say, 'Here I am.'
If you take away^(P) the yoke from your midst,
^(Q) the pointing of the finger, and speaking wickedness,
¹⁰^(R) if you pour yourself out for the hungry
and satisfy the desire of the afflicted,
^(S) then shall your light rise in the darkness
and your gloom be as the noonday.
¹¹And the LORD will guide you continually
and satisfy your desire in scorched places
and make your bones strong;
and you shall be^(T) like a watered garden,
like a spring of water,
whose waters do not fail.
¹²^(U) And your ancient ruins shall be rebuilt;
you shall raise up the foundations of many generations;
you shall be called the repairer of the breach,
the restorer of streets to dwell in.

¹³^(V) "If you turn back your foot from the Sabbath,
from doing your pleasure^[c] on my holy day,
and call the Sabbath a delight
and the holy day of the LORD honorable;
if you honor it, not going your own ways,
or seeking^(W) your own pleasure,^[d] or talking idly;^[e]
¹⁴then you shall take delight in the LORD,
^(X) and I will make you ride on the heights of the earth;^[f]
^(Y) I will feed you with the heritage of Jacob your father,
^(Z) for the mouth of the LORD has spoken."

No Secrets

2011-01-20T22:35:00.012-06:00

This post took awhile to add, because of an internal struggle I was having. This post is about being open and honest with your spouse. The bible states when a man and woman marry, they become one. They are to leave their mother and father and connect to their spouse. In conjunction to this, God states that He loves us despite the sins we commit and have committed. His son, Jesus Christ, model the same love by dying for us allowing us to reconnect with His Father (if we accept Him as Lord and Savior). I have always been extremely grateful to God for forgiving, healing, and accepting me despite my past. Although, I know that He is very aware of my sins, I still confess them and in doing so I’m allowing our intimacy to grow. In my eyes, this is real acceptance and love with no rejection. He is there for me at all times, but I must ‘be real’ in order to grow closer to Him. Since I am a Christian, I am to model this same behavior towards everyone I encounter, especially in my marital relationship.

As most people know, who read my blog; my wife and I were friends before we became romantic ally involved. I was very frank and transparent about my past. After she had proven her self as a safe haven, verbally expressing and confessing was easy. It allowed our friendship to significantly grow. My openness and willingness to be vulnerable promoted her to talk about her past. I can’t express how much these talks connected us. We were becoming one not physically, but emotionally. An emotional affair started before we ever ‘quote on quote’ dated. After we married, we went deeper into sharing and the connection grew. I once not felt rejected for any of my mistakes made. Sometimes, it was very difficult sharing but afterwards we always grew closer.

I learned through this process that we both were given opportunities to model Christ’s behavior of acceptance by forgetting those things in the past and looking forward to our future’s together (Philippians 3:12-14). I recently had an opportunity to share our level of openness with a friend. He was somewhat amazed that I would express my ‘manly’ thoughts to my wife. Since it has been a common practice, no thought had really been given to my admissions. My wife listens as I do the same and life goes on. Recently, I had been dealing with something that I did not want to share with my wife. With the hopes and faith, which I have in God and my marital relationship; I believe my disclosure will draw us closer together (James 5:13-16). My postponing of adding this blog was due to my fear and delay in expressing (despite our healthy history) and towards my sincerity to ‘walk the talk’. I am and will be always a firm believer in remaining transparent in healthy and safe relationships. Marriage should be a refuge for all married couples. Unfortunately, I know that it’s not. If you are unable to express your deepest most intimate feelings and emotions with your spouse, I would strongly encourage your to ask yourself why. Besides our relationship with the Lord, marriage is the most important relationship we will ever experience, according to the Bible.

How can you become one, if you do not share? Quite honestly, it’s impossible. Prayer through Jesus Christ is our connecting force to God. He desires us to have a deeper and stronger relationship with Him. In prayer, we confess our sins, announce our hopes, express our fears, ask for help, and seek guidance. This connects us to God. Why? He knows us and we trust Him. We place our faith in Him to answer our prayers, allow our hopes to be complete, and grant wisdom. This relationship would be impossible, if we did not humble ourselves and trust in His acceptance and ability to assist. If you have chosen to marry someone, you have committed a similar act of humility. Comparable to your relationship with God, in order for this marital relationship to grow, you must continue the humility and trust. Hopefully, you have a spouse who is willing to do the same for you as God does. If not, I encourage you to seek the Lord in prayer asking for salvation for your spouse. This will be the only way for you to share the level of intimacy that God desires His children to experience in a marital relationship.

If you are single know that God has encouraged us all not to marry unbelievers. Even your close friends are to be Christians (2 Corinthians 6:14). In being obedient to this command, you should experience a higher level of safety that is not present in a worldly relationship. My best male friend is my best friend (first and foremost) because we both are practicing Christianity and share an equal level of intimacy with God and one another. Our relationship would be meaningless and superficial, if he or I didn’t bare our souls. It takes courage to do so. Also, it takes a significant amount of bravery to be accepting, loving, and understanding, yet accountable and reliable. The bible compares expressing yourself to people who haven’t proven worthy like giving pearls to swine (Matthew 7:6). Those secrets that you are dealing with are much better to deal with a Christian (loving and trustworthy) friend than alone. God has created us to be relational. Seek out complete Bible-believing Christians and share, share, share and grow, grow, grow!

Please know that my heart is for you to experience God’s best. I’ve made many mistakes in the area of trust. I believe God’s plan is for us to share in our marital and trustworthy Christian relationship. I desire for you to experience His blessings of rest and acceptance. Give Him your all and then, do the same for your spouse.

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

"How'd You Do That?"

2010-12-18T18:35:00.014-06:00

My mom has been a major influence towards me dedicating my life to God through Jesus Christ. I’m not a ‘momma’s boy’ or the type of guy, who cried when he left home to go to college. As a matter of fact, I was ecstatic to leave home. My mom was the type of mother that was always ‘in your business’. I could not get away with anything. When I was doing something that I wasn't suppose to do; I felt that my mom knew about it or would find out. I invoked and witnessed her take a lot of criticism for her parenting. No matter the comments, she stuck to her agenda. Her basis was always Christ-driven. Quite honestly, in my hometown, raising Christian children was truly a challenge.

In my lifetime, I have had some of the craziest dreams. I’m sure you can relate. Some make no sense, while others are a reflection of my thought life. My wife typically is unable to recollect her dreams in great detail. I’m different. Being able to describe my dreams is not so difficult. Typically, they are so vivid and action pack, that it’s hard to forget. Every now and then, I will have a dream that I know is directly a message from God (Joel 2:28). Call it weird, if you want; however, I know that He is figuratively communicating.

One night in my mid-twenties, I dreamt about my mother. The dream started with me and my mom walking (together) past a subway entry. My mom decided to trot down the subway steps. I did not take this route, due to an unsettling feeling. As my mom started to walk down the steps, a creature began to approach her. It was an octopus. The species attacked her with swinging and grabbing tentacles. Within seconds, my mom began defending herself with only her two arms versus the octopus’ eight. After what seemed like minutes of fighting had passed, the octopus finally retreated back to its darkness in the subway. I was amazed and startled by Mom’s ability to fight off this monster. In approaching her, I asked ‘how’d you that?’ She responded, ‘Do not worry about me; I can take care of myself!’ Then, I awoke.

Immediately, the interpretation peacefully and clearly followed. The eight tentacles represented the several adversaries that she faced. Her faith in herself because of God’s promises enabled her to ‘fight off’ the attacks. My mom’s ongoing relationship with the Lord allowed her to succeed in this battle. On the other hand, my unwillingness to walk the same path was connected to my doubts in completely surrendering to God. The revelation was amazingly clear. The disclosure of this dream remains with me to this day. What a remarkable legacy to leave your child. That is, the assurance of your child knowing for what you stand. To ingrain your belief in your child’s being to the point that your offspring dreams about your God-seeking faith.

Now, my mother was not (and is not) perfect. She will transparently tell you the same. As most parents, she has expressed some regrets in the raising of her children. I personally believe any caring parent has these feelings in reflecting moments, no matter their child’s age or overall well-being. However, one thing she will not have to question is her children’s (at least, this child) understanding of Who she serves, worships, and places her hope and faith. The answer to that question would be God through her personal relationship with Jesus Christ.

This Christmas, many parents will shop for the best gifts desired. If their children are anything like my children, they will accept and play with their Christmas gift for a season. By Spring Break, they will move on to the next best toy. Most parents do not mind this process, as they understand; this is the way of a child. For me to give my son a gift that he would forever cherish would be a miracle. Luckily for me, my mom presented a gift that I would one day receive and choose to use for the rest of my life. This gift has given me complete hope in my future (Deuteronomy 5:29), the ability to truly overcome (Ephesians 6:10-17), wisdom (James 1:5), and so many more things.

It’s the most perfect time of the year to reintroduce yourself to your Lord and Savior Jesus Christ and become more committed in service and worship. It’s also a good time to ask yourself ‘why?’, if you have not given your life to God through Jesus Christ. Beginning the questioning process of your salvation and life must start at some point. If you are unable to answer your children regarding your faith, you need to examine yourself. Whether you consider your faith a legacy or not, it will be. It’s human nature for your child to answer the question themselves, if you do not. Get a hold of TRUTH, and then communicate this through your words and actions to your children (or anyone). This is without a doubt, the best present throughout a lifetime, that you can offer your child (or anyone).

If you would like to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

Best Marital Advice I’ve ever received…

2010-12-03T21:34:00.011-06:00

Although, my wife and I were not going to be married in our local church; we decided to take advantage of their free pre-marital classes. The group setting courses were very interactive and informal. Many of the speakers transparently discussed the failures and victories in their marriage. This fostered a comfortable atmosphere which led to honest feedback and in-depth discussions.

One of the speakers was an obviously fit, middle aged man. I immediately noticed his dress attire, which consisted of blue jeans, gym shoes, and a button shirt. As bad as it sounds, I also noticed that his clothing were not popular name brands. At this particular church, the staff generally always was overwhelmingly presentable. It wasn’t that his clothing was unprofessional, but it was the fact that it differed from everyone else.

When he walked to the podium, I internally fought my narrow-mindedness. I was well aware that it was rude to judge a man based on his appearance. His subject was family finance. The passion he exuded, promoted me to become an active listener. The sermon consisted of his favorite financial exhortations along with scriptural references. All of the suggestions were extremely reasonable and refreshing, but his last proposal ‘raised some eyebrows’. “Do your best to live on one (whether husband or wife) income.” My first thought, after he made the remark, was ‘…no wonder you are dressed that way.’ As soon as my wife and I sat in our car, I directly commented on his clothing and one income theory. Six years later and now successfully practicing this financial principle, I realized that specific suggestion was the best marital advice I have received. Good news arrived. Due to not being delivered by a well-known, well dressed, highly charismatic minister, but a conservatively dressed man, I found it difficult to receive.

In accepting Jesus Christ and His ways, one can experience the same emotions. Similar to living on one income, His methods are totally opposite of mainstream views. “It is more blessed to give than receive. The greatest among you will be your servant. Tell the mountain to be cast into the sea without any doubt and it will be done.” When Jesus spoke these words many people surrounding him did not accept His principles. They could not bypass a carpenter’s son considering himself the Son of God. Although, they marveled at his wisdom… the hardening of their hearts blocked God’s blessing of salvation and abundant life. To this date, the same practice is taking place. Yet due to God’s grace, mercy, and patience, He has strategically placed his disciples amongst people who desperately need hope, guidance, and unconditional love.

Life experiences challenged me to accept the one income lifestyle as my life of sin challenged my acceptance of Christ and his principles. The hearing of each caused an internal conflict and produced doubtful emotions. Although, I did not like the ‘how to’; I did like the end-result testimony shared. A sense of urgency to commit was experienced. In both submissions, the harvest has been plentiful. I’m eternally grateful for God’s mercy and patience. His grace is truly sufficient.

The bible states God does not show partiality. So what He will do for me, He will do for you. In today’s time, there are several media outlets, books, magazines, outreaches, ministries, and people expressing their love for Christ. If you live in America, it is impossible to have not heard God’s plan of salvation and abundant life. If you haven’t already accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, the time will come when God will ask you why you did not. You could, like me, be experiencing issues with the messenger. That is totally normal; however, rejecting the Message isn’t acceptable to experience God’s will for your life. Unfortunately, God will not accept your inability to relate as a ‘pass’ into His glory. Accept the message! God is calling you, receive His gift. Maybe later in life, you will understand His messengers.

If you would like to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

The post-game experience: from Abuser to Lover, Pt. 2

2010-11-15T16:27:00.004-06:00

My high school sweetheart was a very thin and tall with a significantly petite frame. After meeting at a basketball tournament, our relationship quickly turned into a teenage love affair. Prior to dating me, she was involved in a relationship with a flamboyant, aggressive, ‘freakishly-athletic’ guy. He had a difficult time letting their past dating relationship go. On several occasions when we were hanging out in her hometown, we would run into him. He would make several direct and bluntly rude remarks with the intentions of embarrassing and challenging me. At their local park, he and I would have intense basketball battles that were typically one foul away from becoming a fist fight. Profanity-laced trash talking and prolonged stares were abundant. Our feud became so intense that people around us always expected a fight, when he or I entered a room where one was already present.

This personal high school rivalry did not keep me from accepting a scholarship to play basketball in my girlfriend’s hometown. Unfortunately, this also was the place that her ex-boyfriend resided. Ironically, when I moved to the new area, my run-ins with my nemesis were rare. However, when we did see each other; it was awkward and heart pumping.

He shared a child with one of the college’s cheerleaders. I really did not know much about her, but I was aware their relationship was volatile. At my first college basketball game, he was present being loud as ever. I was a ‘bench-warmer’. Throughout the whole game, he was in the crowd letting me know about it. Although, the mother of his child had moved on with another dating relationship; she was becoming visibly upset by his demonstrative behavior. After the game ended, I quickly dressed and visited with my mom in the parking lot. All of sudden about 100 yards away, I heard a nervous commotion. Being so distant, I wasn’t quite sure of what was taken place, but had a really good idea. I abruptly left my mom and ran to the scene fearing my girlfriend was being attacked. To my relief, he was not bothering her; however, he was shoving the mother of his child. The large crowd (including my coach and the college president) watching the scene was wordless. In my disbelief that no one was saying or doing anything, I immediately blurted out, ‘Get your hands off of her!’ These were the words that broke through the tension he and I had carried for over a year.

When he identified I was the person that subconsciously ordered him to discontinue his harassing, he charged me. His first connection fractured my jaw, but fortunately for me, I had a size advantage. I was able to overpower him through wrestling. Within seconds of being on top and swinging landing only a few punches, I felt a foot connect with my right rib tossing me to the ground. Then, his family members ‘bum rushed’ me into the ground. There were a total of three guys fiercely unloading on my body before someone (still not sure who) decided to pull them away from me. Getting my butt kicked (literally) my freshman year in college was a crazy experience that I will never forget.

Ironically, years later, what I fought against is what I became. The constant rejection of God led to further debauchery of my spirit and well-being. This caused me to become desensitized to the very things that I most disgusted (Romans 1:28). It is common for this process to happen to people. Unfortunately, fallen ministers are a perfect example. Most Christian ministers wholeheartedly believe the words in the Bible; however, they have the same vulnerabilities as laymen and aren’t excluded to Satan’s attacks. Due to not quickly repenting, they fall short. In all cases, when God is speaking to you about a matter; it would benefit you to immediately do as He request. Your disobedience will eventually harvest.

In my case (and I believe in most people), I saw myself being violent (sinning) before it happened. These images should have been surrendered to the Word of God (2 Corinthians 10:5). In this world, there are so many images and words hovering. If you are not careful, those images and words can become your life; no matter how much you detest them. In staying close to the Lord, your ability to detract sinful thoughts into becoming a lifestyle is higher. Also, remaining transparent about your temptations will help extinguish the fire (James 5:16).

As our loving God pursued David in order to get his attention of an adulterous relationship with Bathsheba (2 Samuel 12), He is using me for YOU. The analogies that I provide are my life stories with the hopes that you will dedicate your heart and existence to God through Jesus Christ. It first starts with a true desire to serve the living God. There is no true wisdom without Christ (James 3:17).

If you would like to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

from Abuser to Lover

2010-10-26T12:46:00.003-05:00

After grabbing my fiancée by the neck and slamming her to the floor, I stumbled around my bedroom fuming mad with feelings of self-righteousness and misunderstanding. The action caused her to run away in complete terror. I recall going in the bathroom looking into the mirror and feeling extremely justified in my actions. Within minutes, a friend who dated my fiancée’s roommate was knocking at the door. I wasn’t quite sure of what his actions would be, but I allowed him to enter. He spoke to me with concern. He had witnessed and discerned the recent internal struggle in my life. The stress of being engaged, starting a new job and graduate school was more than I could emotionally and physically bear. Also, I had been heavily dealing with my spiritual convictions in a non-constructive way. This avoidance and ‘fence-riding’ led to a deeper emotional and spiritual abyss.

After this concerned friend left, I still felt no remorse. After a few hours passed; I was confronted with the reality that this engagement to be married could be no more. That really bothered me for obvious reasons. Despite the abuse I inflicted, I was sincerely in love and committed. After about a day or so, my fiancée and I spoke over the phone about the incident. She was afraid, surprised, and upset. It was obvious that this union was over. I begged, pleaded, and promised to no avail. It was over, rightfully so.

The end literally brought me to my knees because I knew before starting this relationship that God had spoken to me about surrendering my life for His will. This break was the ultimate devastation of my young adult life. It was at this very point that I surrendered my life to God. Disgusted with what I had become, realizing where I was heading, and losing the love of my young life got my attention. I cried out to the Lord repenting and begging.

The ‘I will do this, if You will do this’ plea was verbally applied. I immediately became selfishly and immaturely convinced that God wanted this relationship to work. I was desperate in my attempts to reconcile but failed. Due to the limitations I placed on God, my fears of never experiencing this type of love were consistent and real and further encouraged false hopes. How could I have been so idiotic to think, that those actions would have not led to a break-up or even more (prison)? This was the lowest I had (have) ever felt. This self-created environment was agonizing.

I started taking the necessary steps of healing. Things were changing in my life. I and others noticed a difference. When I would give my testimony, people had a hard time connecting me with being an abuser. Throughout this entire process, I remained hopeful that I would be given a second chance from the woman I was once engaged. This opportunity never came. For several years, it was very difficult for me to accept the consequences of my sins. My hopes for another shot at a healthy relationship were bleak.

There are times in life, when we all feel completely defeated and hopeless. Contrary to how we feel and what we see, we must remember, ‘God is a rewarder of those who diligently seek Him’ (Hebrews 11:6). Despite the shortcomings in life, ‘we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose’ (Romans 8:28). What may seem as God’s best may not be His best for you. No matter how insignificant or significant, reflection is mandated in seeing the goodness of the Lord in a believer’s life. You must first truly believe in God’s word for these promises to be impactful. Believing in God’s word will allow the Bible to be the final authority in your thinking and actions (John 14:15). This will lead to a peaceful and harmonious life.

The moral of my story: I being terrible and deceitful in my acts repented by choosing a different Path. I made a mess of a promising relationship, and then endured a season of grief. I asked the Lord to change my heart and help me become what He needed me to be. In seeking Him my mind is being made ‘right’. This makes it easier to identify His treasures. One fortune was a good wife for me. In performing my past acts, did (do) I deserve these gifts? I did not; however, God has rewarded me. The same can happen to you as it did me. God can meet and exceed your needs and reasonable wants.

My plea is for you to surrender. Life is mostly made complicated by our decision making; however, this does not have to be so. Being in accord with God, helps simplify living. Do not allow your sins to deeply affect a love one before you ‘fall to you knees’. The thought process behind ‘God getting your attention’ is not biblical by any means. It is not necessary for you to reach such spiritual depth before you give your will to God. He can turn your life around this very moment, but you first must decide to allow the change of your heart.

If you have read my past blogs, you know my purpose is pointing you toward Jesus Christ. There is no ulterior motive in my actions. Your salvation and faith in a righteous God and Savior is my goal. I’m trying to help you see the Light in this dark world. Do not be deceived by religion without Jesus Christ. This will lead you to heartache, misery, confusion, and pain. God has made a way; so accept it, begin your real life, and be prosperous and blessed.

If you would like to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

Deliverance

2010-10-15T13:53:00.003-05:00

At my old church, there was a deliverance ministry. For those who are unfamiliar with the term, deliverance; it is a word used to describe a person being freed from ungodly spiritual bondage. Through my times of worldly living, I developed some habits that were not instantly broken when I committed my life to Christ. It required some serious prayer, desire to change, discipline to live, and Holy Spirit to obey. Throughout the struggle of letting go of an unhealthy spiritual identity, I realized the power of God to change lives. One of the biggest struggles I faced was my love for secular hip-hop music.

In reaching out for help from my church, I met with three older Christian men. I exposed personal vulnerabilities with the intentions of receiving prayer and guidance. My expectations were met. During the meeting, I remembered informing the guys that I loved ‘hip-hop’. Without any hesitation, they quickly said that my passion for secular music would go away. Don’t ask me why, but I felt (at the time) that they were too lax in their approach regarding my concern for this matter. Before this church, I was a member of two different churches that taught about the power of words (speaking and listening). The music that I preferred was not edifying my spirit for Kingdom thinking. I needed to be free, now. This is what I expressed, but there was no stress; they simply reassured me.

I left there feeling unchanged in this area. Confirmation of change would have been nice. Months later, I can recall watching a Jay-Z video and becoming emotional because of how much his music moved me. I loved Jay-Z. However, as I matured in my Christian walk, I started noticing different emotions when listening to hip-hop. My spirit would become uneasy, irritable, and righteously upset with the words spoken. I realized how Satan was using music to deliver evil spirit-filled words that were contrary to God’s word. My eyes were opened to what was really going on. The music (sound of instruments) was still enticing, but not the words. The deception of the words behind the music was revealed to me in a way that made it distasteful.

The assurance of my deliverance from the ministers emerged. I was free, indeed. In the realm of music, my spirit was aligned with God’s word. God liberated me to a point that today my IPod is only filled with Christian preaching. I believed that my true desire to honor God in my hearing manifested into this habit. The biblical words of death and life are in the power of the tongue, let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, and that, men will have to give account for every foolish word they have said had come alive in my heart.

Please do not take what you hear and say lightly. In this media age, it is a constant battle not to be engulfed in sinful words. Comedies, Dramas, Music, and even the news provide the opportunity to begin speaking and thinking in an ungodly way. Unless you are planning on becoming media-free, the task of speaking and hearing only biblical principles is near impossible.

This is the case for most that choose to live a godly life. Christians are constantly provided with opportunities to live contrary to God’s will. No matter your stand for God, you will face opposition. If you are unaware of God’s help through the Holy Spirit (John 14:26) to enable you to live a blameless lifestyle, you may become overwhelmed. Living for God takes more than claiming a religion and asking Jesus to come into your heart. It takes consistent word reading, godly accountability, prayer, and a desire to serve the Lord. God has commanded that we live separate and not to love anything of the world (1 John 2:15-17). Quite frankly, this is a difficult commandment to consistently live on your own.

As you read this blog, the Holy Spirit may bring to your attention a few opportunities to exemplify your love for the Lord. It is your job as a Christian to deal with these issues. Freedom can be yours, but it first must begin with your repentance and confession. Acknowledging how the world has a grasp on you is the beginning of deliverance from any issue. Aligning your thoughts with the Word (Proverbs 23:7) of God will grant you more freedom than you can ever imagine. Trust God to do His part and meet you where you are (James 4:8). With your consistent seeking of His will for your life in this area, He will renew your spirit to align with His plan (Hebrews 11:6). Trust the Lord’s ability to change your life for I am a living witness.

Da Paperboy!

2010-09-21T12:35:00.009-05:00

After about 3 months of moving into our neighborhood, my wife and I realized that God blessed us with something we didn’t pray for- great neighbors! Within months, we would congregate outside enjoying our children’s play and the beautiful weather. We quickly decided that having a block party would be beneficial for better community relations. In doing this, we would be able to meet distance neighbors from the opposing end of the street.

At our block party, I was fortunate to meet a respectable, God-fearing, and honorable young man. I was captivated by the high school student’s wishes to please the Lord. He spoke eloquently about his upbringing from inner city to suburbia to his relationship with mentors, church members, and parents. All encompassed his current relationship with Jesus Christ.

He was (is) the prototype of a young Christian man. Listening to him inspired better parenting and a personal relationship with God. I desire for my sons, what he genuinely modeled. In a world where it’s extremely common for children to be negatively influenced; a spiritually healthy adolescent is a ‘beacon of hope’ for parents raising small children.

He recently released his first Christian Rap album titled ‘Read All About It’. I was blessed with the opportunity to video interview, Daniel ‘Da Paperboy’ Cooper. During this interview, he shares his passion for glorifying God, encouraging words to parents, and more.

Please take the time to listen and watch the video. You will be encouraged!

Da Paperboy from The Seminary DropOut on Vimeo.

A better way

2010-09-09T16:25:00.003-05:00

When I was single, I hated it. Call me a punk, soft, weird, conservative, or whatever; but, I’ve always been the ‘marrying’ type. Secretively, in my late night club pursuits, the objective wasn’t the one night stand, but to meet someone whom I could share my life. An attractive, opposite-sex friend with some similar dislikes and likes who could (and wanted to) deal with all my quirks for a lifetime was my camouflaged goal.

After seven years of being single, God unexpectedly blessed me with what I was looking for. Seven years (approximately 2,555 days) of singleness was an emotionally lonely period. However, it was a time that I truly gained an appreciation for women. I went from having girlfriends to having girls who were simply friends. Of course, it took help from God (Holy Spirit) to live this way. My former life required (requires) heavy reliance on God’s promises and protection toward living a holy lifestyle. At times, I did fail, but those times of failure and repentance made marriage even more appealing.

I have been married for over five years. I’m still a rookie ‘in this game’; however, some realism has set in. Most ulterior motives and unrealistic expectations have been exposed. Arguments, dirty diapers, emotionally-driven purchases, sexless nights, demanding children, and weeks of casseroles have helped me identify with most married couples. In each of these situations, the ‘get me out of here as fast as possible’ thought has crossed my mind more times than once. Fortunately, I haven’t had the guts or true desire to walk away from my wife and children.

Before I married, I was cognizant that this was a decision. I was aware that if I was marrying for Hollywood sex, grilled ribeyes and apple pie for dinner, lingerie, and an easily submissive wife, that I was deceiving myself. Marriage had been communicated as an act of service. The Bible and other Christian influences made it clear and it was clearly understood. So on my marriage day, I made a commitment to God, His Son, His Spirit, my wife, my son, my mother-in-law, my father-in-law, my grandparents-in-law, my parents, my grandparents, my siblings, and my friends. Each person present was affected by my decision to marry. Therefore, it would be ironic and selfish to think that the same people would not be adversely affected, if I choose to split from my wife.

I know that marriage is a risk, even if you marry the ‘right person’. That my spouse can gain 100 pounds, become an addict, have an affair, physically harm me, or simply decide that she no longer loves me. Due to my lack of experience with these issues, I’m ignorant of the emotions that are attached. As a Christian, it took me little time to realize that being a part of God’s family didn’t exempt me from being emotionally or physically hurt. The certainty of being offended or ‘let down’ by my spouse was evident. No one (Christians and non-believers) whom I ever met with has endured years of marriage without a major argument or outstanding disagreement.

Regardless of what I saw in others and the fear of the unknown, in my time alone, God had demonstrated His faithfulness. His ability to work out my self-inflicted circumstances, when I totally submitted to His will, was impeccable. God’s faithfulness gave me a sense of self-assurance, that no matter what I experienced in marriage; he would carry me through… if I choose! If I abided in His will regarding marriage, that I would be a success. That is right, I.

Unfortunately, we are incapable of making decisions for other people. God has given us all free will. In being godly, you should allow the same freedom for your spouse regarding marital decisions. With this said, God has set guidelines for the husband and wife. Christian marriages should be governed by these laws. It is an expectation of marriage that you will be honored, respected, and loved; yet, this is an atmosphere that has to be created. For most, this does not come easy. There are many worldly influences that consistently fight against this thought process. That is why it’s imperative that you study and follow God’s word.

Will you avoid separation and divorce? Only you and your spouse can answer this question. For both begin with a thought, that if not submitted to God’s word will override your covenant. God is for you and has given you all the resources needed to succeed. I have noticed in my marriage; the more I serve and obey the Lord, the better my marriage. As serving and obeying the Lord is a direct correlation to a healthy marriage. God instructions to us all (married or not) is to serve one another (Galatians 5:13), treat people the way you want to be treated (Matthew 7:12), consider others better than yourself (Philippians 2:3), and to share (Romans 12:13). As funny as it sounds; these are traits that my 2 year old is learning in Mother’s Day Out. This is how elementary God has made His word, so that every man and woman can understand it and be victorious. There are no excuses! If you can read, then you can choose to obey, and thrive in all relationships, especially marriage.

Remember, a healthy and joyful Christian marriage starts first with accepting God’s plan for salvation. Of course, a personal relationship with Jesus Christ is not required to have a happy marriage, but salvation is.

Be encouraged!

If you desire to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

I don’t need this

2010-08-22T01:44:00.018-05:00

YESTERDAY, I started reading my devotional. As I began to read, I noticed that the topic was forgiveness. Immediately, I decided that I didn’t need to hear another message about forgiveness, because there wasn't anyone that I needed to forgive. This same day, I needed to mow my front lawn. So, I downloaded the latest sermons of some of my favorite ministers to my IPod. I assumed this would be a good substitute. As usual, the messages were motivating, inspiring, and Christ centered.

TODAY, I woke up beginning my morning ritual of email checking and coffee drinking. During this time, I noticed that there were still old basketball pictures lying on my desk, which I had scanned to add to my Facebook page for fun. This sparked me to check my alma mater’s media guide. Earlier in the month, I had told my wife and oldest son that I had broken the school’s top 10 in two categories for a single season and career records. After the completion of my senior season, I was given a document created by the university’s media relations department indicating single season and career stats. As I looked through the media guide stats, I saw familiar names. However, my name was no where to be found for the stats in which I should have been recognized (according to university’s media relations document). Immediately, I was offended and took it personal.

My college basketball playing years were complex. At times, it was absolutely awesome in all ways; while at other times, it was miserable. My head coaches and I never saw ‘eye to eye’. As mentioned in past blogs, I always challenged authority. My senior season was no different. Although, I was a team captain and starter; I did not hold back on sharing my dislikes for my head coach. Needless to say, he was not a player’s coach. Some of my concerns and comments were legitimate, but not necessary. This boldness caused a major conflict. By the end of the season, he openly confessed in front of the team that he knew that I did not like him and that the feeling was mutual. I could go on with different scenarios, but I feel the point has been made. He did not like me and I did not like him.

My relationship with my coach disturbed me for awhile. I can remember praying about disappointment in authority relationships; asking God to help me forgive and to be forgiven for my insubordination. During this prayer, my coach was mentioned. I thought this was final. However, when my name was not recognized for hard-earned records; I immediately became emotionally hostile exclaiming to my wife, that he possibly singled me out. All the memories resurfaced along with the past emotions. My patient and understanding wife reassured and encouraged me that it was possibly overlooked. After I told her several stories about this coach with hopes that she would see things my way, she asked me if I had read my devotional today. I hadn’t.

After I calmed down, I opened my devotional. The devotional is day specific with month and date. I searched for August 21st. I began reading it, but wasn’t quite sure why my wife thought ‘being light in a dark world’ had anything to do with our conversation. I quickly glanced to August 20th, which was the adjoining page and figured it out. My wife was a day behind in her devotionals. Today, she read about forgiveness. This was the same devotion, which I neglected the day before due to my ego. The lesson I learned from this situation is apparently simple. Always read my devotional, no matter what the subject or where I (believe I) stand in my relationship with God.

Proverbs 16:18 states ‘Pride goes before destruction and a haughty spirit before a fall’ (English Standard Version: ESV). Man, oh man, did I fall! Thankfully, I heeded the encouragement to seek the Lord, which helped realign my actions and thoughts. God is so faithful and continues to provide substance. The Spirit-led Bible study written years ago was exactly what I needed to sustain me for the upcoming day. However, I chose not to partake in what God had provided. There are so many promises in the Word of God to help us in today’s times. The error in our ways are many. From believing that the Bible is irrelevant (not literal), old-fashioned/conservative to too simple leads to a path of devastation. God’s word is relevant in every form. There is no subject matter that He has failed to cover. Parenting, marriage, career, forgiveness, friendships, etc. can all still thrive in today’s world, if you follow His guidance. Not only one area will you prevail, but all.

There are plenty of worldly examples of success in single areas of life (such as financial accumulation), but not all areas. Many celebrities excel in developing riches and material wealth. As rich as they may be, most fail in other vital areas. Without accepting God’s provided substance for life, they will fall short. No one is excluded from this principle. Celebrities are simply the easy target. Jesus Christ said it best, ‘Man shall not live on bread alone, but by every word that comes from the mouth of God (Matthew 4:4-ESV). Knowing, believing, and following only a few scriptures will give few successes. Knowing, believing, and following all scripture will give you overall success in every area of life.

If you find yourself failing in an area of life, pick up a Bible and seek instruction. God will help you overcome. Take it from me; it’s best to be prepared for Satan's attacks. He’s crafty and recognizes your vulnerable areas. Do not ever let down your guard with arrogance, as I did. If so, you will be defeated. Remain in prayer, be on guard, and consistently rely on God’s word. In doing this, you will succeed.

Stay encouraged!

Accepting Jesus Christ is the first step to having a relationship with God. Chose God’s plan for your salvation.

If you desire to have a personal relationship with God by accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

No complaints

2010-08-12T22:38:00.017-05:00

“That’s some good ole’ keep your mouth shut!” Kenneth Copeland

When I first heard this, I started laughing hysterically almost wrecking my car. Kenneth Copeland is one of my favorite Christian ministers to hear. He’s hilarious, brutally honest, old-school, and faith-filled. I view his preaching style as a grandfather speaking to his grandchildren. To say the least, I thoroughly enjoy his personality and scriptural deliverance. On this particular day, he was speaking on maintaining your faith in God’s promises. His direct encouragement was watching your talk; being sure that you were not speaking the opposite of The Blessing. To be truthful, I can’t remember the exact scripture that he referenced before speaking the aforementioned quote. However, that quote stuck with me.

I have always been drawn to faith-filled churches. As a matter of fact, the name of the church were I rededicated my life to Jesus Christ is Faith Clinic Christian Center Church. God was obviously aware that my faith needed some healing and guidance. This church was the foundation to my Christian walk. There was a scripture that was included in almost every sermon, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue…” (Proverbs 18:21). It made such an impact on me, that I have had it attached to my email signature for years. The church trained members to be careful of what we said; no words opposite of God’s will were taken lightly. Even after being a member for one full year, I thought it was weird and to be honest, cult-like. However, as I have matured in the Lord, I have come to realized the power of our and others speech and my prejudice views.

Did you know that when you pray the will of God (that is, scripture based prayers), that you are to believe that your prayer will be answered, according to His word (Mark 11:24)? For instance, God has promised us, that if you confess with your mouth, "Jesus is Lord," and believe in your heart that God raised him from the dead; you will be saved (Romans 10:9). Some have no problem accepting Romans 10:9 but have more difficulty in accepting other promises God has given us.

I can remember when I first started giving; I had the hardest time accepting Luke 6:38. First of all, I wasn’t giving with the intentions to receive, but to hear that I would receive the way I was giving didn’t quite mentally register. I would confess in church this promised blessing of God before giving my tithes and offering. Later, I would find myself doubtingly joking with friends that I didn’t care if I received or not; I simply gave because it felt good. Thank God, that he is faithful and ‘sticks’ to His words. As I did receive, based on what he commanded. My point is that my faith didn’t align with God’s word. I would confess His words, but later deny His power to fulfill. According to 2 Timothy 3:5, due to my lack of faith, I was a person that Christians were to avoid. Wow! That’s how serious God is about taking His word to heart.

He does not want Christians having communion with Christians, who deny, that He can do what He says He can do. According to thefreedictionary.com, one of the definitions for deny is ‘refusing to believe.’ In this case, this definition definitely applies. Abraham believed God had the power to do what he said he would do (Romans 4:20-25). Through Abraham, we are heirs of The Promise by accepting Jesus Christ. We are to do and confess what God said. Being that we are consistently watched by unbelievers for authenticity, your behavior and definitely words need to be aligned with God’s.

One of the most unselfish wills that God gave is for all men to be saved (1 Timothy 2:1-4). As I have clearly stated in past blogs, I was a tremendous sinner. However, I’m saved through Jesus Christ. If you would have met me 15 years ago, you may not have believed that I would have accepted God’s plan for salvation. If you would have been praying for me to accept Christ as Savior, you may have doubts based on my behavior. Also, if you held relationships with people, who believed that I would never ‘get it together’, your faith confession for my salvation would have become even harder to believe. Eventually, the war of God’s words versus what you saw and worldly words would have taken full battle. More than likely, you would have begun speaking the opposite of God’s word. I have seen this happen many times in my life and the life of others. It typically starts subtle, but eventually adversely affects your prayer of what you believe God for. James 5:16 states the prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective. Abraham was credited as righteous because he believed in God (Genesis 15:6). In order for you to be consider righteous, you must whole heartedly believe in God, as well, or your prayers are not effective.

Begin watching your tongue, the slightest negative word has the power to ruin your entire day, week, year, and possibly life. Also, this may hinder your prayer from being answered because of your double-mindedness. If you are clearly praying God’s will, mix your faith with patience and allow God to demonstrate His faithfulness. In the meantime, until your faith is aligned with God’s; it's best to simply keep your mouth shut! As the saying goes, “if you do not have anything good to say, don’t say anything at all’.

Keep it righteous!

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

Bull Head!

2010-07-30T08:39:00.004-05:00

In the early 90’s, high top fades with several parts and word art were popular hair cuts styles. The 90’s were in my teenage years, so of course, I had the most recent hair design. My childhood barber was good at meeting my request. He was an extremely bright and creative guy, who could freestyle rap at any moment; creatively find humor in non-humor situations. One day, while cutting my hair, this extroverted barber noticed the significant difference between the size of my head and his other customers. The flood gates of jokes began. The most memorable is his explanation of how he should charge me for two haircuts, instead of one because of my head size. After what seemed like an eternity, he discontinued his joking by closing his performance in nicknaming me ‘Bull Head’.

At first, it seemed that only his family favored the new nickname. However with time, it became pretty popular with the men and my peers in the community. When my dad first heard ‘Bull Head!’ he hysterically laughed. He claimed that it was perfect. He thought it was given to me, because of my stubbornness. Instead of the head the size of a bull, he viewed it as the temperament of a bull. Unfortunately, it was justifiable no matter how you viewed it. I absolutely hated when someone told me what to do. Also, my head was larger than any of my friends.

After leaving my neighborhood for college, the nickname faded away. No one at my new residence called me, ‘Bull Head!’ Although, the nickname wasn’t with me any longer, the head and stubbornness were. I still resented when any authority corrected me; even the more, if I felt they were a person unworthy of my respect. A college basketball coach quickly became this identity. Although, my coach was inducted into two halls of fame for his career achievements; I did not overall respect him. I didn’t feel respected, so he received no respect regardless of his authority and position as my coach. Verbally sharing with coaches, bosses, and professors my discontent with their ability to lead, instruct, and relate became a lifestyle.

In my mind, it was justifiable. If you lacked passion, care, and concern for leading, coaching, or teaching people and held a position that allowed you to do so; someone needed to let you know. That someone typically was me. Regardless of the ramifications, I spoke my mind. “I was keeping it real!” I was being ‘Bull Head!’ It wasn’t that I hated authority, but I hated when authority didn’t live up to my personal standards. This is why; I was so comfortable for such a long time verbally belittling them.

Not until I was married did I truly realize that I had an issue with authority. My conservatively outspoken wife challenged my behavior. Also, being in a leadership position allowed empathy for those I had brutally critiqued. Romans 13:1-2, read as follows…

Everyone must submit himself to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. Consequently, he who rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves.

Bringing judgment on oneself is exactly what I was doing. No one needed to ‘call me out’ as the Holy Spirit gently reminded me how I wasn’t living up to the standards that I had set for others. After a few years of management roles, fatherhood, and being a husband, humility set in. Life circumstances taught me that I’m better off staying true to God’s Word regarding authority.

Being disobedient to this scripture can be accomplished on many levels. Maliciously complying to your boss, while discussing your dislike for him/her does not honor God. Belittling the President of the United States for any matter is contrary to God’s will. Falsifying details about your spouse to friends and family shame your God-given covenant of marriage. Criticizing your parent’s child rearing is dishonorable. Whether your claims are somewhat justifiable, this behavior weakens your testimony as a Christian and according to Romans 13, forecast judgment.

Through most awkward authority relationship, there was something that God desired for me to learn. I believe this to be the same for most people. David succeeded in his efforts to obey God regarding authority. At the time David was anointed King of Israel, there was an acting king, Saul. Saul was selected as king upon the request of the Israelites. After a battle against the Philistines, Saul disobeyed God by keeping property that was informed to be destroyed. After Saul’s disobedience, God rejected him as king and anointed David. David rose in fame amidst his people. Upon hearing of David’s killing of Goliath, Saul requested the assistance of David. As David became more popular, Saul’s jealousy manifested into a murdering evil spirit. David ran away from Saul. Throughout this period of ‘cat and mouse’, David had opportunities to kill Saul. However, he did not. The bible states that David would not harm the ‘… Lord’s anointed’ but was aware that the Lord would deal with him justly (1 Samuel 9-24). What integrity, patience, and faith it took for him to be so honorable.

Unfortunately, in this life, we will be given many opportunities to be ‘David or Bull Head’. Choose to be a David in your authority relationships. Recognize that David provided a godly example in his behavior. Doing so will emulate true Christianity, as Jesus submitted to the cross under the world’s authority for the sake of God’s will. We are to peacefully do the same. Although, the size of your head may be smaller than mine; you still can be a ‘Bull Head’! Remember, harming authority begins with a thought. Be sure to align your thoughts to the will of God (2 Corinthians 10:5).

Stay encouraged!

Know your role

2010-07-18T09:27:00.011-05:00

Starting a blog has helped keep me on course to pursuing my God-given calling in life. Although, I’m not sure where I’m specifically headed; I’m sure that my post are a testament of Jesus Christ. Each month, I seek the Lord in what He desires to communicate through me. I’m amazed of what I can recall in scripture to solidify the message. Sometimes, the perfection for clarity makes it hard to illustrate the point. Wrapping everything together for the sake of exalting God through Jesus Christ can be challenging.

Most times, the biggest concern is not to be opinionated, but biblical. During my short stint in seminary, a professor once said that if she came to hear a student preach and it was opinion, not biblically, based that she would leave during the message. This remains with me as I write these blogs. I certainly have an opinion about most. Communicating God’s opinion (will) for every matter is the goal.

All of us have God-given talents. The pursuit of how we use these tools to glorify God is our job. Jesus told a parable about a journeying nobleman who left money for his servants. Upon his return, he held accountable each servant who received money. The men, who invested and profited their master, were considered good and granted more based on their willingness to work with what was given. The servant who did not invest was labeled ‘wicked and lazy’ and removed from the master’s protection (Matthew 25:14-30).

The same principle applies to God’s children. As aforementioned, God has given us all talents. Some use their talents to endorse self, while others exercise their gifts to magnify God and edify others. The best general example of using talents selfishly may be secular musical artists. Many begin with a whirlwind of success in their respective genre of music only to later significantly decline with a life involving drugs, alcohol, failed relationships, and many more ungodly attachments. To a certain extent, their ability to perform may still be present (due to God’s faithful grace), but their life a mess filled with years of debt and deceit. As the master states in the parable, ‘Come and share your master’s happiness!’ to those faithful servants. Peace and joy are attributes of serving God. Using your God-given talents for the purpose God intended leads to these qualities.

God created us for a reason. Unfortunately, we were not born with an individual life manual; so we need to use The Manual (Bible) and spend time with God in order to discover his purpose for our lives. I can attest to a life of using my gifts and talents unwisely and wisely. The results of the unwise choice led to defeat, low-self esteem, heart break, and lies. So far, the wise choice has harvested peace, joy, self-fulfillment, purpose, direction, self-worth, and a good name.

I encourage you to use your talents to build the kingdom of God. Throughout my short life, I have met many talented people. In attempts to separate myself from the pack, I pursued higher education and certifications to add to my resume. Some were with good intentions, some were not. The more mature I become, the more I realize that I simply am not good at some roles, regardless of the training. Self-acceptance is the beginning of fulfilling God’s plan for your life. Moses had a tough time accepting his God-given calling. He argued with the Lord, until God designated his brother, Aaron to assist him. God comforted Moses informing him that He would ‘…teach both to speak and what to do’ (Exodus 4:1-14). The Bible makes reference to God becoming angry with Moses’ initial response; however, the faithful grace of God prevailed. God added neccesities to have His purpose fulfilled to a willing vessel, Moses. The same can happen for you.

Fortunately for us, God does not change His mind. When he makes a promise, it shall be fulfilled. There was a job, and then there was YOU. Fulfill your purpose! Discover and embrace it! Begin your journey with the first step of accepting His plan for communion through Jesus Christ. Do not be separate from His Spirit. First, accept the plan of salvation as your foundation to fulfilling your destiny. It truly begins there!

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord, Savior, and connection to God, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/stepstopeace/index.aspx

I was only pretending

2010-06-23T11:52:00.007-05:00

One of the deciding factors to purchasing our home was the two block distance to our homeowner’s association pool. Summers in Fort Worth can be extremely hot. Having easy access to any type of water to drench your body is a plus. When the slip-n-slide and sprinkler will not do, off to the pool we go.

This past Memorial Day, floats, diver toys, and kids filled the pool. The number of people heightened my wife and I awareness of our children. While she was busy with our youngest son, I ‘pool floated’ hidden under dark shades and a visor watching our eight year old son. His verbal and physical interaction with others clearly indicated that he was becoming a young man.

After about an hour of being at the pool, my son and one of his female friends decided that they were going to fight for my pool raft. Instead of allowing them to ‘pull and tug’, I encouraged them to share the raft. It was large enough to support their weight and size. As they floated together, our floatie-secured 2 year old quickly joined them. He was greeted with a kiss from his affectionate brother. Within seconds, he was crying to be removed, desiring to float on his own. His mother removed him, turned away, and within seconds, my oldest son made his first attempt to kiss a girl (on the cheek). Luckily, she turned away and gave him evil eyes.

After examining myself, I felt my son needed to be held accountable for his actions. Since kindergarten, his mother and I had stressed the importance of not improperly touching or kissing anyone. He was well-aware of our expectations and his role.

While walking home, he was asked about the kiss. He shared with us that he was only pretending and did not kiss her. I began with my long dad speech of how a girlfriend/wife means responsibility. His body language about the matter was very lax indicating his lack of concern for my views; however, he did apologize for his behavior. I appreciated the apology, but didn’t experience a peace of mind regarding his understanding.

I couldn’t seem to let go of what happened. The matter greatly disturbed me, because of my past relationship with girls/women. I do not desire for my sons to live a similar lifestyle. One of the key deterrents of the girls, that I didn’t pursue, was an accountability factor. Whether the accountability was a questioning parent, big brother, bullying uncle, or annoying cousin of the girl; it got my attention and kept me away from girls that were not worth the trouble. Unfortunately for my son, the young girl didn’t have any similar advocates. Due to his comfort level, I would have to play all roles.

The God-given idea was to have him inform the girl’s father of his kiss attempt. I hoped that this would provide substance to this much-needed to learn lesson. Well, to say the least, my son was extremely frightened. His body language immediately changed, once he was informed of the confession he would make. He cried to his mother in complete fear of the unknown. She gently consoled him with affirming words, but I continued to ‘drive home’ our concern. Fortunately for my son, the girl’s father was not home; however, the mother was. She expressed her concern for my son and her daughter. The point was made.

When I was a young boy, my mother held me to similar standards. I can recall a friend spreading a rumor about me and a neighborhood girl. My mom heard about the rumor and questioned me. The story was totally untrue; however, she was not convinced. She decided to speak with the girl’s mother. The girl’s mom confronted me. I was held accountable for my part in creating this rumor. A lesson was learned. I never attempted to date the girl, again or participated in such a rumor.

Children, especially young boys, need to be held accountable for their actions. Proverbs speaks of how disciplining your children will give you rest (29:17), hope (19:18), and a future (22:6). Also, the wisdom-filled book of the Bible states that not disciplining your child will bring you shame (29:15) and demonstrates unhealthy love (13:24). God encourages us to confront our brothers and sisters, who sin against us. Scripture informs Christians to confront the offender with another believer, if he/she doesn’t acknowledge his wrongdoings after the first confrontation (Matthew 18:15-16). This is why it’s so important for a mother and father to be on the ‘same page’ when it involves discipline.

Living a righteous life amongst your children will give you more credibility than your parental authority in confronting your children about ungodly issues. Teaching godly lessons early in life may prevent severe issues in the teenage and young adult years. Let’s all be encouraged to love our children, the way God loves us (Hebrews 12:5-8).

Yeah, I'm Bragging! Psalms 34:2

2010-06-12T19:03:00.007-05:00

For the last 12 years, I can honestly say that I have faithfully tithed (given 10% of my income to the Christian church). The church I joined as a young adult strongly taught the principle. Thank God, it was something that I never had struggles.

When I began, the amount was significantly less than what is given now. There was truly no pressure, worries, or concerns about the money gone. Of course, I thoroughly understood why God encouraged me to give, but I wasn’t thinking about why- just giving it. At the end of the year, I was (am) always amazed by the overall amount of donations claimed.

Years later, when I met my wife, I encouraged her to practice the principle of faithfully tithing. Lucky for me, she was already a giver. Out of all the mistakes that we made during dating, inconsistent-to-not tithing was not one of them. We committed to honoring God in giving. For us, it was one of the easiest forms of worship.

As we grew in our giving, we began to see God’s protection, promotion, and provision. Our faith grew in Him. Our testimony to all was give and it will be given to you! (Luke 6:38). More than financial blessings took place, but relational, emotional, and physical blessings happened. There was no doubt that God’s principle instructed in Malachi 3:8-12 was real. My wife and I were employed with decent salaries to easily support our family’s conservative lifestyle and financial responsibilities.

There was never a recognizable test of my faith in God’s ability to fulfill his promise regarding tithing, until about a year and half ago. I was offered an opportunity to relocate with my employer. Months before this opportunity, my wife had just given birth to our second son. She had always wanted to stay home with our children, but had worked full-time since being a mom. I had promised her while dating, that she would be able to stay home to be a full-time mom. The move would allow it. This was a blessing.

After securing the family in our new city, the reality of being the sole financial provider for my family began causing personal stress. I say personal, because I never fully expressed this to my wife. I should have, but my pride wouldn’t allow it. It was not that I was concerned with our income, but the economy. What if I lost my job? The idea of letting down my family and asking my wife to find a job (not a career) became fears of the unknown. At times, I allowed my emotions to overtake me.

One thing, I have learned, while being a Christian, is God is faithful. If you are obedient to his commandments, blessings follow. You may not receive what you had in mind, but you will receive.

After realizing that I was focusing more on fear-based circumstances than God’s faithfulness to fulfill His promises, I was given peace. The gift that I most needed at the time. An increase in salary would have been a temporary fix. My underlining issue was unbelief, which caused inner turmoil and mental discomfort. Money can not repair insecurities. Peace from God can. God provided my sense of relief in His word. A conditional promise was given. Faithfulness had been displayed on my and His end. Why worry?

There have been times in my life, that I have been called ‘lucky’. I prefer to be called ‘blessed.’ One of major distinctions between blessed and lucky is obedience. Do not be surprised if you are not receiving, if you are not giving. It’s a biblical principle that is in use by many, who do not claim Christianity. Many principles that God has outlined for His people, when practiced by ungodly people, produces great results. If He said do this and this will happen- you can plan on it. His character is supreme (Numbers 23:19). If a seed is planted, a harvest is due; whether you have accepted Christ or not. Therefore, do not be upset (if you are) when ungodly people thrive financially, mentally, and intellectually. They may be extravagant givers to a Godly principle. True wealth is your soul prospering (3 John 1:2). Without Christ, it’s impossible.

God’s ultimate gift was Christ. If you are obedient to the principle of wholly receiving Him and giving Him (Matthew 28:19-20), you will more than thrive financially, physically, and intellectually, but spiritually. Be obedient to God’s principle of Salvation for your soul. Afterwards, offer Him to the world, then allow protection, promotion, and provision to overtake you.

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyandTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_With_God.aspx

Why did I say that?

2010-05-19T10:33:00.005-05:00

Everyone who really knows me is aware that fitness and diet are an important part of my lifestyle. I’m not a robot that only eats beans, veggies and fruits, and fish and chicken. I occasionally eat cookies and drink sugary refreshments. Although, I do enjoy my guilty pleasures; it is not a habit to eat them. My body (as most people) always responds awkwardly to an overhaul of sugar and unhealthy foods. As I get older, I also have noticed that burning off those extra calories is super tough. I desire to keep my body looking young for as long as possible.

The other day, after a long day of working, I entered the house to the smell of fresh homemade baked cookies and lasagna. My wife took the time to prepare food from scratch. This is completely out of the norm for her. She exclaimed, ‘I made homemade cookies for you to take to work and homemade lasagna for dinner!’ Without delay, I said ‘Man, you went carb crazy!’ Right after speaking, my wife eyes began watering and I realized that I was an idiot for the moment.

About a week prior to this incident, my daily devotional covered the subject of mastering the tongue. The author made reference to James 3:1-12. This passage of scriptures talks about our inability (independent of God) to tame the tongue. Verses 9 and 10 states…‘with the tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God's likeness. Out of the same mouth come praise and cursing. My brothers, this should not be.’ How unfortunate that I have been unable to control my words at this stage in life. I have learned the more comfortable I become in relationships; if not careful, the more ridiculous my words. I do not desire to say hurtful words, but they are a reflection of my thoughts; so, I say it.

Before I started pursuing Christ, I was a prolific curser. I can recall swearing in public at a movie theater. A woman, who was offended by my language, asked me to stop. It was embarrassing, but not humiliating enough to discontinue. Thankfully ‘just because’ swearing immediately ended when I accepted Jesus as my Lord. Environment-provoked swearing did not. When someone or something upset me, if I did not say it aloud; I definitely cursed ‘in my head’. It was, and is, a constant battle to renew my mind to be more like Christ in order that I may speak blessings, instead of cursing.

Luke 6:45 reads…
New International Version- The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For out of the overflow of his heart his mouth speaks.

New Living Translation- A good person produces good deeds from a good heart, and an evil person produces evil deeds from an evil heart. Whatever is in your heart determines what you say.

New American Standard Bible- The good man out of the good treasure of his heart brings forth what is good; and the evil man out of the evil treasure brings forth what is evil; for his mouth speaks from that which fills his heart.

To make a long story short, the answer to the title of this blog is ‘because of my heart’. Instead of expressing gratitude for a homemade meal, I choose to speak about the content of the food (quality of the gift). The food’s effect on my body was more important to me, than my wife’s act of service. Vanity over thanksgiving is my issue.

We all have ‘heart conditions’ that do not align with Jesus’ plan. In discovering these areas, we have a choice to change. Change begins with confession, then actively pursuing holiness through Bible reading, scripture meditation and spiritual awareness. It’s definitely ‘easier said than done’ as it may take time to change. However, as you seek the Lord, His character and priorities will become yours (James 4:8). Your nature will become His. Peace will enter your heart, and then peace is what you will speak. So, if you find your words making you sound like an idiot, pursue the Lord. He will change the overflow of your heart.

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyAndTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_With_God.aspx

Your Child Marries You

2010-05-07T23:12:00.008-05:00

I’m a person that likes to think years in advance. This part of my personality always leads to asking hypothetical, but ‘eventual happening ‘questions. One day this led my wife and I to begin talking about our future daughter-in-laws. Although, our children attend Mother’s Day Out and the 2nd grade; it’s fun to envision their future.

Our sons have different personalities. One is super strong-willed, durably tough, prematurely likes sports, and a ‘night owl’; while the other is easily compliant and offended, artsy, and prefers to be in bed by 830p and awake by 6a (without an alarm clock). There are commonalities between the two boys such as their preference for mom over dad, but their differences are many.

The ‘future daughter-in-law’ conversation led to a question. What would you hate most about your daughter-in-law, if your son married someone identical to you? Now, I’m not the sharpest husband in regards to saying the right things. I have made some downright ‘bone head’ statements to my wife that I dearly paid. However, this question was not directed towards my wife confessing her shortcomings, but simply a ‘what if’. After my wife answered the question, I did the same. Eliminating our deficiencies created our ideal daughter-in-law.

Answering the ‘question’ promoted a greater sense of urgency towards pursuing a Christian lifestyle. My children have unknowingly become great motivators. I don’t mind working longer hours, using extra money to pay for the best camps, daycares, or education, and eating dinner every night at the dinner table. With this said, I do mind waking up at night to a crying kid, watching Yo Gabba Gabba instead of Sports Center or Lost, and sharing the shower with a ‘needing to go to bed soon’ toddler. The issue with my ‘I minds’ is the self-serving attitude. I’m aware that this mindset is being witnessed and learned by my sons. If it’s not resolved, they will more than likely exemplify the same character towards their children. Their foundation for this attitude will be ‘my dad did it!’ I have chosen to desire the better attitude of ‘Jesus did it’. If I am to live my belief, there’s no better initiative than my children acting out Christ’s behavior, due to witnessing my lifestyle choices.

Jacob, father of the twelve tribes of Israel, had a deceiving mother, Rebekah. She encouraged her son to deceive his father, Isaac, to bless him with a birthright that rightfully belonged to his older brother, Esau (Genesis 27). Of course, Jacob prevailed in his conniving plan, but later produced deceiving children. His sons would trick him into believing his favorite son, Joseph, had been killed (Genesis 37:12-36). Unfortunately, the root of deception could be traced back to Rebekah and maybe further, if we knew the whole story.

The same will happen to your children and grandchildren, if you do not choose to deal with your inconsistencies in living a holistic Christ life. I realize this truth the older my son’s become. The ‘funny’ things I do in the comfort of my home is not so ‘funny’ when my children do it in public (or at home). You’re an example is a reality.

Most parents desire to see their children joyful, prosperous, ‘well taken’ care of, and in healthy relationships, the list goes on. If you are not providing a good example or insincere in your religious attempts, please expect them to mimic your actions. Allow your children to motivate you to become closer and authentic in your personal relationship with the Lord. Children need to witness your Faith in action. They need substance- a solid foundation that never shifts, regardless of the circumstances (Ephesians 2:19-22). This foundation is Jesus Christ. Do not assume they know who you worship and praise, but be specific in your delivery (Deuteronomy 6:6-7). Specifically address Him!

If we follow the ‘map’ Jesus Christ laid out for us to follow, we will be free from concern or worry (Philippians 4:8-9); due to the seeds we planted in our children’s life. Then, if your child marries someone like you, you would have peace (2 Corinthians 6:14-16). They would harvest a wonderful return. Remember, your children will carry your family legacy (Psalms 127:3). Invest in them by investing in yourself. Start by asking God for direction. They are watching you!

If you would like to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyAndTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_With_God.aspx

Boldly Speak Up!

2010-04-28T21:56:00.014-05:00

About five months ago at the gym, I overheard a member (Jim) expressing to his workout buddy his wife’s (Sue) challenge of holding a friend accountable. Sue’s challenge and concern was directed towards Jim’s friend having an affair. Jim’s friend’s wife was unaware of the situation; however, her husband was indirectly bragging about his conquest to Jim and others. Unfortunately, Jim’s relationship to the adulterer was connected to convenience of some sort (I’m not sure what), so it made confrontation undesirable. From what I gathered, while being noisy, Jim decided that he was going to accept Sue’s challenge by expressing to his friend that his behavior was ungodly, unacceptable, and damaging all his current relationships. During Jim’s conversation at the gym, he made it a point to announce his Christian faith. He believed that adultery was a sin and was aware of his error for being accepting of this behavior. Needless to say, I was impressed from what I overheard. So impressed, that I pulled Jim aside, before he left the gym, acknowledged my appreciation and admiration for his courage and commitment to our shared faith.

About three months ago, I started instructing fitness boot camp classes in the early mornings at the gym. Upon arriving to the group fitness room, Jim and some of his workout buddies were in the room performing an unscheduled, non-group fitness approved workout called ‘P90X’. They had moved in a flat screen television and DVD player. I thought it somewhat strange that they were at a health club performing a workout program designed for home; however, I did not own the gym, so I had no real authority to express my opinion. I had a class starting in 10 minutes. According to their video, they had 18 minutes remaining. I had a dilemma that I was totally unprepared. I asked Jim and his friends, when they would be complete. I was immediately met with an explanation from Jim of how long they knew (in a relationship with) the owner of the gym. After hearing the life relationship to the gym owner, I was aware that I had a bigger problem than eight minutes. I was really surprised by Jim’s reaction. All I could remember was our last conversation. How he had announced to be an accountability partner to his friend. His reaction to my question disturbed and angered me. I simply had to calm myself. Long story short: I waited until they were complete, before I started my class. This became a pattern. I showed up to prepare for class; there was Jim and friends. I would inform them of the class times and days; they would be annoyed and overstay into the start time of my scheduled group fitness class. Eventually, I thought they would be respectful and honor our class and its participants; however, this did not happen. The gym owner and managers were made aware, but no success in keeping Jim and friends out of the room.

About two months ago, I had reached my tolerance level of Jim and his friends. I perceived from their actions that they had no respect for me or the group fitness participants. It was time to handle this situation. One morning, while driving to the gym, I prayed asking the Lord to help me be kind, respectful, and not contrary to my Faith in my actions. I believed what I prayed would come to pass. Entering the gym, the front desk receptionists smiled as she always does, when Jim and his friends are in the group fitness room. My heart began pumping through my chest, literally. I entered the room. Immediately, eyes began rolling and sighs were heard. Without any hesitation, I announced to them that they needed to be ‘gone’ in 5 minutes. Once again, Jim informed me of his relationship with the owner. This time, I was unfazed. There was no ‘backing down’, but courage, boldness, and assurance. As I spoke to Jim, I could see the shock in his eyes. The themes of my words were directed towards their blatant disrespect. After verbalizing my thoughts, I walked away ensuring their must needed departure in five (now two) minutes.

I decided to briefly separate myself from the situation by going to the restroom. While returning to the group fitness room, I heard Jim conveying his disbelief in me asking them to depart, so classes can be held on-time. Jim was so angry, he was swearing/cursing. As I walked into the room, I told Jim to ‘watch his mouth’. He then said to me that he only said, BULLSHIT! My immediate thought was ‘really!’ This angered me. I called Jim a ‘hypocrite’, that his preaching of Christianity (one day) and un-Christian actions (another day) was my basis. Of course, Jim was really upset by what I said.

After the situation ‘simmered down’ and I gave it some thought, I somewhat felt bad for calling Jim a hypocrite. I analyzed for a time period ‘why’ I felt this way. Did his actions demonstrate the opposite behavior of a Christian lifestyle? Did he acknowledge that he was a Christian? Did he state that his friend’s lifestyle was ungodly? Was he disrespectful to the gym, its employee, class, and participants? The answer to all my questions (from my interaction with Jim) was ‘yes’. So why, did I feel bad? His actions and words were obviously hypocritical to what he professed.

I’m convinced that I felt ‘bad’ because of the politically correct world that I reside. As a believer, every day, I encounter offensive behavior or language at my workplace. The perpetrators are not apologetic or aware. There appears to be no thought given to my offense. Profanity and indecencies are accepted as commonalities among adults. This is how worldly people communicate and act, not Christians. Therefore, when a self-professed Christian begins acting ungodly, you must remind him/her of their ultimate calling in being witnesses for Jesus Christ. Quickly get their attention and don’t feel bad for it (Galatians 6:1). Yes, we have all fall short of the glory of God, but direct, intentional, and un-repented sin must be met ‘head on’. Your courage to provide another view to your brother/sister in Christ may save them from a very unfortunate situation. If you are met with objection, know that its not you they reject, but Jesus Christ. Stand firm in your Faith and stand for righteousness. If the truth will not be accepted by them, it will definitely set you free in expressing it. We all need accountability in our life. If you are on the receiving end of correction, for your own sake, repent and ask God to help you comply to His way of living. It is for your own good.

This may not be the most encouraging blog written, but it can be, if you will accept the challenge to be a witness for Christ. There are black and whites and yes and no’s. The bible is not antiquated; it’s the same yesterday, today, and forever (Hebrews 13:8). God’s words still apply to modern day life. Verbally and physically express your concern for ungodly living to Christians and non-Christians. Set yourself apart and be holy (1 Peter 1:16). Please, be encouraged and live for Jesus Christ.

If you choose to accept Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior, please click on the link below. Also, welcome to the family!

http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyAndTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_With_God.aspx

Sustaining Encouragement

2010-04-11T11:48:00.011-05:00

My freshman year in college was an ‘eye-opening’ experience. I moved approximately 60 miles from my home town to attend junior college on an athletic-scholarship. Many of my teammates were more experienced, athletic, and capable of immediately playing collegiate level. I was ‘hands down’ the worst conditioned player. My lack of cardiovascular and muscular endurance caused the team to run more wind sprints than planned. I couldn’t seem to get across the finish line before time expired. It was a horrifying experience. Being ‘singled out’ in this manner was definitely not my plan. Dreading practice became a daily ordeal. I had to choose, ‘fight or flight’. Thankfully, I fought. In my mind, there was no other choice. With improvements came some success, but to my head coach, a reputation had been established. No matter how well or hard I practiced or performed in games, my playing time didn’t improve. Internally without doubt, I knew if the chance was given to me- I would play well.

After a frustrating freshman year, due to my amount of playing time and recognition, I flirted with quitting and transferring to another college. During the end of the spring term, the college’s head assistant coach decided to move on. I respected his authority as a coach; although, he did not play college basketball. He attained a law degree, but decided coaching was his way. Throughout some of our practices, it was easy to see his passion for ‘the game’. When he informed the freshmen class of his upcoming departure, we were upset for good reasons. After making his announcement, I had the opportunity to individually speak with him. During this meeting, he told me something that ‘stuck’. Although, I had struggled to find an athletic identity throughout my freshman season; he saw my uniqueness. He said, '...in my upcoming sophomore season, I could be the leading scorer and rebounder; if I choose'. His prophecy was fulfilled.

Joseph, the son of Jacob, had a similar experience. His vision had the potential of not coming to past, if he would have not accepted his ‘dream’. Joseph, already being disliked by his brothers for being his father’s favorite, expressed his dream to his family. His vision summarized the entire family being under his authority. His siblings and father weren’t impressed and accepted it as arrogance. Joseph was labeled as a ‘dreamer’, as he was not the oldest son (the pre-ordained appointed heir). His brothers devised a plan to get rid of him (Genesis 37). Unfortunately, Joseph’s vision didn’t foretell being sold as a slave and years of trials and tribulations. Joseph endured mockery, betrayal, and wrongful allegations. Yet, his belief in God’s promise and himself helped him maintain Godly integrity. Throughout Joseph’s journey of becoming the ruler of Egypt and saving his family from a massive famine were plenty of opportunities for discouragement. The Bible states that ‘the Lord was with Joseph…’ During Joseph’s hardships, his real identity was recognized by a foreign king. Although, this new country was unfamiliar with Joseph’s God; they saw the favor of God on his life and wisely exalted Joseph because of it. Eventually Joseph’s family was at his door step needing his assistance for survival. Those who attempted to destroy him and God’s plan were publicly humbled. Joseph’s dream became a reality. (Genesis 39-45)

The world is full of doubt and unbelief. Life gives us opportunities to accept others perceptions and final defeat. Joseph’s dream took awhile to manifest. He lived a Godly life and was granted favor. His faith in God’s dream for his life caused him to be righteous. It didn’t take long for others to recognize his talents and potential. It first took him to ‘walk his talk’ and become a person of purpose. His faith activated his future by being proactive in his present. God has granted many blessings to those who choose to obey him. As He is a God who requires faith (Deuteronomy 11:13-15), time plays a role in his will being displayed. People were created to rule and have dominion. However, many people are not doing so, due to following a set of rules that are contrary to God’s commandments. This is the cause to unbelief, despair, and defeat in several areas of life. The end result of these actions is death (Romans 6:15-23); death to peace, joy, and overall health.

God has placed a dream in everyone’s heart. If mentioned to friends and family, your dream, like Joseph’s, may be ridiculed, misunderstood, and labeled. The more you accept this dream and God’s ways in helping bring to past; the more peace you will have (John 14:26-28). As you begin walking in faith of His will, others around you will notice (but, may not verbally express) the reality of your greatness in 'this area of life'. You were created for a purpose (Jeremiah 29:11). Live like it! If you have no ‘dream’, you have even more the reason to pursue Him starting with giving your life to Christ. Jesus Christ has promised his followers a Helper, who will assist in carrying out God’s will. An Assistance who will immediately notice and magnify your gift. By practicing Christ’s way, it will be no need for a coach or authority figure to acknowledge your potential. Deep down inside, you will acquire an unshakeable faith of your future and its holdings. God may use someone to temporarily encourage you, but His encouragement will sustain and remain in your spirit, if you remain in Him (John 14:11-14).

If you choose to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyandTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_with_God.aspx

Not by power, Not by might

2010-03-25T15:30:00.011-05:00

The other day, I was watching ‘Homecoming with Rick Reilly’. It’s a show aired on ESPN that chronicles the life of current professional athletes. The guest of the day was Dwayne Wade, current NBA star for the Miami Heat. His mother, Jolinda Wade, was not present for the major part of his childhood and teenage years, in which he moved in with his father and stepfamily. The reasoning behind Jolinda’s absenteeism was an addiction to drugs and alcohol. Rick Reilly, the host, is known for asking pretty invasive and bold questions. One of his questions to Dwayne’s mother was directed towards how she broke free from her addiction. Jolinda confidently and boldly stated the following and I paraphrase. My pastor opened his Bible and directed me to 2 Timothy 3:5… having a form of godliness, but denying its power. Three days later, she stated to be free of her drug addiction. Immediately, I connected with Jolinda because I could relate. Based on the audience’s applause, its safe to assume her transparency touched many.

As a young child, I attended a small missionary Baptist church. During most of the church services, I wondered why I was present. There were rare times that I connected with the speaker. Thankfully, I have matured and appreciate my mom’s encouragement and guidance in attending Sunday services. However, it’s a shame that as a child, I never accepted the revelation of the Spirit of God to change my life. I recall in my early teens accepting Jesus Christ as my Savior. Attached to my decision was a good emotional feeling and pride for pleasing my mom and grandparents, who regularly attended. I understood that I needed Christ for protection from Hell/Satan, but that was the depth of my understanding (unfortunately, this wouldn’t change until early adulthood). About 3 weeks after becoming a Christian, I was in the guidance counselor’s office for using profanity. My mother was contacted at her place of employment to visit my school due to her son’s behavior. Her look of disappointment dictated what my future would hold upon arrival at home. My father was informed and his upset tone indicated similar fate. After arriving home and receiving my mother’s correction, I knew that I would have to explain this unacceptable behavior to my father. When my dad arrived, we chatted. He was obviously upset and wanted to assure that I understand the importance of not using bad language. In attempt to not receive more ‘correction’, I informed my father that I was trying my best to change since becoming a Christian. Of course, this was to detract from being spanked, but also somewhat true. If only I understood God’s authority inside of me.

Before Jesus physically departed from his disciples, He promised a gift from his Father. This gift was the Holy Spirit, the spirit of God present in every Christian. Jesus stated that at the coming of the Holy Spirit, the disciples would receive power to be witnesses throughout the world (Acts 1:4-8). Inside of every Christian is the ability to overcome every sin. This ability has been provided to us because of God’s grace. We must choose to access the Spirit of God that lives inside of us. It must become a reality that we have authority over every obstacle, as Christ has already defeated the dilemmas you face. The most important part of walking in God’s authority is being a good witness. One can not considered themselves effective in influencing anyone for the kingdom of God, if they are not readily walking in the Spirit; as the verse states, receiving ‘power’ was connected to being a witness.

Many Christians practice behaviors that are un-Christ like announcing Christianity for their own benefit, yet ‘turning their backs’ on the most elementary biblical principles. It’s hypocritical, unfortunate, and plays an integral role (in my opinion) of why Christians lack influence today. Generally speaking, we simply do not access the Spirit that resides within us to consistently overcome sin, encourage others, remain faithful, stay optimistic, and lead a holy lifestyle. ‘I’m a Christian’ should be said in our actions, not words. We are the heirs of a promise. A promise to be ‘…be the head, not the tail’ [leaders not followers] that is of course, if we follow the Lord’s commands (Deuteronomy 28:13).

If you have accepted Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, I strongly encourage you to examine areas of your life were you are being defeated. These unresolved areas are keeping you from being an effective witness for Christ and withholding blessings due to your disobedience. In the case of Jolinda Wade, she missed the blessings of motherhood to a young child and teenager, due to her disobedience in accessing her God given right through Jesus Christ to overcome an addiction. While attending church, she was convicted of her lifestyle and decided to accept the full blessing of God. After years of drug addiction, drug selling, and slum living, she is, now, an ordained minister and reunited with her family. Jolinda’s case was serious, as she was a drug addict. Drug usage is regarded as a terrible among the worldly and Godly, so it receives more negative attention than most destructive behaviors. Your issue may be more subtle, not noticeable among your peers. However, you know it’s holding you back. You must deal with it, before ‘it’ deals with you, your family, friends, and lifestyle.

If you have not giving your life to Christ, then you are being defeated in the most important battle, eternal salvation v. damnation. You need to give your life to Christ. Accepting Him into your heart as Lord and Savior is first and foremost, the most important decision one can make. Moving forward, you must begin reading the Bible. Learning God’s word will help replace your worldly thoughts with the mind of God. Being obedient to His commands will enact His will in your life and you will access the Holy Spirit to do your assignment. Make this decision, today.

Zechariah 4:6

‘…not by might nor by power, but by my Spirit,’ says the LORD Almighty.

If you choose to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link .

www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyandTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_with_God.aspx

Try this exercise!

2010-03-07T10:26:00.003-06:00

Choose not to speak negative about your relationship with spouse, friend, family, neighbor, and/or peer. Choose not to speak negative about your work place, marriage, authority figure, and/or country.

This exercise is easier to read than literally follow. I have found in some of my closest relationships that it’s easier to talk about our dislikes than likes. That is, ‘Hey, can you believe that Billie is dating Sue! Does he not know…?’ Closeness is discovered through your dislikes for Sue's behavior and Billie’s taste in women. Without a thought of your distasteful conduct and gossiping words, you are judging and belittling someone.

I recently visited with a person whom I believe to not be a Christian. During our visit, a comment was made. ‘Conservatives (which referred to Christians) are so judgmental!’ Unfortunately for me, I couldn’t argue with passion or conviction, because I believed the statement to be generally true. My life experiences play a major role in thinking this way. It is a shame, but true, that I have starred in many life movies as the lead actor in a judgmental role. I don’t believe it stemmed from the thought that I was better; but the stronger case being, judging was a way of relating to a group or individual, which typically were conservatives.

I find that each day, I’m faced with the decision to get involve or initiate. I may have a simple thought about a behavior or attitude I dislike. Engage in morning light-hearted, pessimistic conversation to spark the office mood. Pleading my case to no avail without any agenda other than making conversation. This is foolish, pointless and not constructive in being a good witness. Simple negative words will drive you farther away from developing an intimate, influential relationship. There’s a trust factor in every relationship.

Jack knows if Tom talks about Billie’s issues when Billie is not present, that Tom will more than likely talk about him (Jack) when he is not present. Therefore, Jack doesn’t have real accountability with Tom due to his lack of relational trust. With no trust, intimacy is stagnated or broken. This issue between Jack and Tom may never be verbally or emotionally confronted. Jack and Tom have issues (as we all do), but don’t take advantage of their time together examining each other (Proverbs 27:6). When they meet for lunch, because of their chosen path, the depth of their conversation continues to lead to Billie’s issues. Intimacy has plateau.

The devil has an agenda in all your relationships. Whether you consider your relationship healthy or not, the gossiping, superficial cycle is an easy trend to follow. Be on guard and choose to exercise your right to speak blessings. Do not get caught in the cycle of speaking defeat about a friend’s situation, business venture, bosses’ attitude, or our country’s current status no matter the circumstances. It is a sin to do so and truly one of the quickest ways to damper the mood.

If you find difficulty speaking positive, faith-filled words, you must examine yourself. I would encourage you to begin reading your Bible and discovering what God has to say about the situation. We serve a God with plans to prosper us and give us a hope and future (Jeremiah 29:11). If your speech does not match His plan, you are not aligned.

Matthew 12:35-37
The good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and the evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in him. But I tell you that men will have to give account on the day of judgment for every careless word they have spoken. For by your words you will be acquitted and by your words you will be condemned.

If you chose to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyAndTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_With_God.aspx

the Truth will set You free

2010-02-23T09:39:00.005-06:00

In the summer of 2001, I was a camp counselor for a Christian sports camp. The camp traveled throughout the southern region of the United States stopping at college campuses to lead sports clinics. Our staff consisted of volleyball, softball, baseball, and cheerleading coaches. The experience is extremely memorable. The opportunity to get away from my comfortable environment and adapt to a new surrounding with people from different parts of the states was somewhat challenging. However, the opportunity of meeting people, touching the lives of children and teenagers, and growing as a believer was much needed.

During this time in my life, my emotions still somewhat dictated what I ‘said’ and ‘did’. More than ever, since rededicating my life to Christ, I had the tendency to say things that made ‘no sense at all’ simply to encourage a laugh. Whether it rudely interrupted, mocked authority, or encouraged observations of other’s flaws, I would verbally acknowledge it; knowing that during the process, I was wrong. If the crowd or one person laughed, my ego was fed. My ability was not a secret to anyone, as everyone knew to be careful with the words or actions around me. To this day, it is a past behavior that I probably am most shameful.

Throughout the summer, personalities were established amongst the group. There was a staff member, that I was not really close to, whom hardly ever said a word. When he spoke it was encouraging and positive. His actions matched his words, as he was ‘happy-go-lucky’ and much admired by everyone.

During the 4th of July weekend, our group took a much needed break. We decided to go into New Orleans to visit the inner city. Of course, while there we saw many different people. I happen to see someone out of this ‘many people’ that sparked my visual interest. In response, I excitedly commented in a jokingly, what I thought at the time, Christian manner to ‘this guy’. Looking for a ‘buy-in’, I was met with a scripture not an opinion.

Ephesians 4:29
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.

“Wow, did you really just quote scripture at me?” This is the exact thought that entered my mind. I don’t remember what else he said, but this scripture was definitely remembered. I was immediately angry at the young man. I felt that he did not understand me or where I came from. I immediately isolated myself from him. Watched him more carefully and held a grudge for the words spoken.

After four weeks of being encouraged to watch my words, I was unable to sleep. I’m not a man that cries much, but when I do, it’s a terrible, ‘snot-blowing’ experience and this particular night, the snot was overflowing along with tears. The Word of God communicated to me in an untouched area. The conviction was real. If I desired to continue growing with God, I needed to repent and ask God for his help in this defeated area of my life. Thankfully, I did. Today, I still struggle with the use of my tongue towards building up others; however, I’m much better.

Recently, I was given a verbal ‘pat on the back’ from an ongoing observer. For the most part through my adult life, I have been told that I have a bright future with charisma ‘to match,’ but this day, I was told something that I considered an achievement, not a gift. I was informed that I was careful with my words and possessed the ability to know ‘when to’ and ‘not to’ speak. It’s comical considering my past. If you were to ask my wife, she may not 100% agree, as it is easier to watch your tongue at work versus your home. Yet, I rejoice because of the progress. I’m convinced that had I not repented and asked God for help, this compliment would have ever been heard.

When God gives you a command, He does not factor in your experiences, background, or obstacles. He expects you to obey. It’s for your own good. He promises that He will never allow more than you can bear. The sooner you submit to His will, the faster you will experience peace and joy. If the Lord uses someone to speak His words into your life, rejoice! Even the more, if the person is upright, God-fearing, and follower of Jesus Christ. After praising Him for His truths, follow through by repenting and following His path; as it is, the only way to experience real freedom.

If you chose to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyAndTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_With_God.aspx

Choose Life!

2010-02-12T15:34:00.008-06:00

Being disobedient to the commands of God is the fastest and easiest way to self-destruct your life. The demonic spiritual forces residing on this earth have a purpose for your life. You may be totally unaware of Satan’s influences in your life, but believe me, he and his followers are aware of you and your potential. Spiritual warfare may be rarely spoken in your group of friends. However, it is a reality that takes place everyday of our life. You are fighting a battle (Ephesians 6:12)! Who you represent is the question you must ask yourself.

Each day, reading your Bible to understand God’s purpose for humanity is a great start; however, obeying God is the ultimate key to living His will. In reading and following the Bible, you are not complying with Satan’s plan for you or adversely affecting the life of your children, family, friends, co-workers, etc. You will be one less person not fulfilling their potential. God’s plan is for every man to receive salvation (1 Timothy 2:3-4). We have all been selected to receive this gift. There’s not a chosen selected few who will inherit His kingdom. If this be the case, there’s no hope in life. You live, die, and spend eternity without your creator, God. This makes no sense. God made a way for you to experience His will through Jesus Christ.

During the days of Christ, religious leaders fought against Jesus Christ eventually crucifying Him for being the son of God. The Spirit of God didn’t live within them, but a religious spirit, and they were unable to recognize God's salvation. The Bible states that those who had solid relationships with God rejoiced at the birth of Christ (Luke 2:25-32). They were not chosen to know that this child was the world’s Savior, but knew because of their time spent with and faith in God. The same principle applies today. As the saying goes, ‘Know God, Know Peace! No God, No Peace!’

So if you claim a relationship with God without accepting Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior and actively living for God, you are lying to yourself and others. As the religious leaders, you are making a fool of yourself! If you didn’t know about God’s plan for salvation, you are ignorant no more. Make a choice to accept, serve, and obey Him. If you did know about God’s plan for humanity and are not ‘walking it out’, you have chosen a very emotionally, spiritually painful and miserable life! If it hasn't happened already; the cursing of disobedience will manifest in your life. God will not be mocked; you will reap, what you sow (Galatians 6:7). Whether you believe it or not, His spiritual laws will not be denied. I say these words in complete, God-fearing love. Don’t take my word alone, but read the Bible. The Old Testament and New Testament are full of life morals for the obedient and disobedient.

Before Christ, God called a man, Abram, to fulfill His will. Based on Abram’s faith in God’s promise, he and his descendants were chosen as God’s people. These people were not always obedient to God’s way of life and constantly turned away . Therefore, God informed his people of His law’s effect on their lives, encouraging them to choose the blessing through obedience. If they choose to disobey, but eventually repented, the blessing would return. According to Galatians 3:29, the promise of the blessing still exists today through Jesus Christ. God has made a way for you through accepting Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. If you want to experience the blessing of God, accept His plan and began obeying Him and watch your days transform into a life of peace and prosperity. He promises.

Deuteronomy 30:2-6 (NIV)
…When you and your children return to the LORD your God and obey him with all your heart and with all your soul according to everything I command you today, then the LORD your God will restore your fortunes and have compassion on you and gather you again… Even if you have been banished to the most distant land under the heavens, from there the LORD your God will gather you and bring you back… He will make you more prosperous… The LORD your God will circumcise your hearts and the hearts of your descendants, so that you may love him with all your heart and with all your soul, and live.

If you choose to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyAndTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_With_God.aspx

Terrible 2s

2010-01-25T21:23:00.006-06:00

1 Peter 2:1-3 NIV
Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind. Like newborn babies, crave pure spiritual milk, so that by it you may grow up in your salvation, now that you have tasted that the Lord is good.

Hebrews 5:11-14 NIV
We have much to say about this (obedience), but it is hard to explain because you are slow to learn. In fact, though by this time you ought to be teachers, you need someone to teach you the elementary truths of God's word all over again. You need milk, not solid food! Anyone who lives on milk, being still an infant, is not acquainted with the teaching about righteousness. But solid food is for the mature, who by constant use have trained themselves to distinguish good from evil.

Caleb, may I have a hug and kiss? No! Caleb is your diaper wet? No! Caleb, it’s time to take a nap. No! Caleb, eat your vegetables. No! Caleb, that’s Bryce’s toy. Mine! Caleb, please don’t bang on the laptop. Mine!

Whether you are raising a boy or a girl, more than likely you have (or had) a toddler who discovered that they had choices. Unfortunately for them, they lack verbal and emotional skills to express their desires causing them to ‘lash out’ in obnoxious temper tantrums and unbearable mood swings. Regardless of the child’s ability to communicate, most parents will not tolerate temper tantrums and/or mood swings. Children are expected to be obedient to the parent’s rules. Most parents enforce compliancy with the hope that their child will be respectful and slowly adapt to expectations. However, most toddlers challenge their parents and struggle making sense of why they are unable to ‘play in dirt, before family pictures’. The child is still learning that the parent has its best interest ‘at heart’. The parent makes decisions based on life lessons. The parent sees the ‘bigger picture’ for their child and, whether the motive is selfish, desires the child to have a wonderful, pain-free life. The parent adores the child and believes that no one possibly can love it more than he/she. Yet the ‘two year old’ is unable to comprehend the loving boundaries. With the combination of parental consistency and child maturity, the child’s behavior will eventually stabilize. The matured child will decide whether it will or will not follow the rules of their parent.

God loves you, the same. He adores you, has your ‘best interest at heart’, makes decisions based out of love, and believes that no one can love you more. Unlike a parent/toddler relationship, God understands it all. He simply desires you to communicate with Him. In your attempts to communicate with Him, He is not going to ‘put you in time out’ or ‘point to every thing, other than what you are talking about’. He understands. He promises to comfort, take away burdens, and relate to you (John 14:15-17). The relationship begins with you. He wants you to spend time with Him (James 4:8). If we choose, we may forever remain spiritual toddlers and consistently fall in elementary areas which He desires us to conquer. ‘Throwing fits’, ‘pointing fingers’, ‘name calling’, speaking negative about our current situation, and repeating the same mistakes are not God’s plan.

In our western society, it is unacceptable for a 10 year old to act like a 2 year old. As Christians, the expectations for believers should be similar. We are to grow with God and conduct ourselves always in a Christ like manner (1 John 2:6). Remembering that our response to Him should always be, ‘Yes!’ because He knows what is best. Also, if He asks of us we should give because it and we belong to Him. We can choose to reject our Heavenly Father and His plan. He will not force Himself upon you, but desires for you to choose His blessing (Deuteronomy 30:19). Just as a parent disciplines their child with hopes, the Lord’s spiritual laws guide us. You cannot reject God’s plan of salvation or any other principle and experience His total blessing. You may be blessed in certain areas, but the peace of God will never be with you (Philippians 4:7). It’s start with a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. If you reject, you will forever remain in your ‘Terrible 2s’, saying ‘No, No, No’ and ‘Mine, Mine, Mine’ and never realizing your Father’s bigger picture for your life. You must decide!

If you desire to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, please click the link below.

www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyandTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_peace_with_God.aspx

The devil’s a ‘liar’

2010-01-06T14:44:00.005-06:00

At age 22, I began to truly think about the direction of my life. I had begun smoking marijuana, which was something that I promised myself I would never do (drugs). Being a collegian athlete made this easy, as there were random drug test discouraging usage. However at this time of my life, my college basketball eligibility was exhausted and there were no barriers from experimenting. Also, I was dating several women with no intentions of marrying. My life had become out of my control. I was addicted to a destructive lifestyle with intentions to change, but no power or concrete motivation to do so. I began consistently reading the Bible; however, I didn’t change or make a practice to change any habits leading to the aforementioned issues. I was reading and learning Bible verses, but I was not practicing (Matthew 7:26). For a season, it made me feel better about myself. However, God was dealing with me about making a commitment to live a Christ-like lifestyle... to die to myself. Meaning giving Him my life and asking for his deliverance, while walking in faith to be healed (changed) and obedience. As I got closer to making a decision to follow Christ, the adversary of God noticed. He was not going to allow my decision to be easy.

The devil is the ruler of this world. He has spiritual influence over anyone who has not committed their life to Jesus Christ as Lord (Ephesians 6:12). Therefore, I allowed him to control my life due to my lack of commitment and unwillingness to obey.

I met a young lady that I felt ‘heads over heels’ in love. In the midst of this dating relationship, I forgot about engaging in following Christ, but instead, got engaged to be married. I graduated from college, started graduate school, landed a decent job, and stopped smoking marijuana. In the sight of others, my life was changing for the better. I was becoming a good person. All the while, there was a bad feeling in the pit of my stomach indicating otherwise. I knew exactly what it was, but didn’t have the courage to humble myself and follow God. I was sleeping with my fiancée with an unrepentant heart. Although, I enjoyed the benefits of sex; it was eating at me- big time! I knew that it was contrary to the lifestyle that I was verbally confessing following. So instead of dealing with the matter, I lied to myself. “God, the only thing that I have read in the Bible that I’m struggling with is sex before marriage. Surely, you understand and do not want me to go with out.”

Instead of repenting, I excused myself to perform a natural act that was/is common among those in a committed relationship. The devil has spiritual influence over anyone who has not committed their life to Jesus Christ as Lord. The natural, yet spiritual act that didn’t involve the blessing of God gave the devil a ‘window of opportunity’. His opportunity was not through my act, but my unwillingness to accept Jesus Christ as Lord of my life. My continuous act of disobedient without asking for His sincere help to change was my faith confession. As time passed, I realized that I was ‘out of control’ (again) with a whole new vigor and better yet, I was involving someone.

To make a long story short, I eventually snapped (literally) with this tale peaking at the ultimate ‘I will never do’ of physically harming a loved one. Better yet, I felt righteous and unashamed in my act. When the consequences of losing the relationship were a reality, I immediately felt to my knees in repentance crying out to God. Knowing that the heart of my problem was my unrepentant and uncommitted heart, I was selfishly ashamed. Thinking that I could walk with Christ, while allowing sin in my life, was a lie. I believed it! The belief in the ‘lie’ led me into a ‘deeper sea’ of sin.

Nevertheless, God is faithful. After true, heartfelt repentance, He forgave me (Romans 8:28).

The moral of this life lesson is ‘don’t believe the hype’! The world is full of specialists and experts telling you how to live your life. If any of the information you are receiving is contrary to the Word of God (Bible), you are being deceived. The longer I live, the more I realize, that God means exactly what He says. He loves and desires for you to have a fulfilling, successful, and prosperous life (Jeremiah 29:11). All His words are design that you may live a righteous life (2 Timothy 3:16). If you believe that your ungodly action (sin) is being overlooked, you are on the path to destruction (Luke 12:2-3).

The purpose of this specific blog is to encourage you to repent of your sin and ask God for his immediate help through Jesus Christ. Learn from my mistake. Deal with your sin, repent now, and flourish in God’s will.

Philippians 2:5-11
Let this mind be in you, which was also in Christ Jesus… he humbled himself, and became obedient unto death, even the death of the cross… Wherefore God… highly exalted him, and given him a name which is above every name: That at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of things in heaven, and things in earth, and things under the earth; And that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.

‘To the glory of God the Father…’ bow now and receive the blessing of salvation and prosperity.

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour, please click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyAndTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_With_God.aspx

They do not know what they are doing!

2009-12-29T18:36:00.007-06:00

Luke 23:34
Jesus said, "Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing."

In the early 2000s, I held resentment towards childhood authority figures. I had bad knees because of coaches who made me practice and play despite pain. I had bad credit because of no financial counsel. I had physically and verbally abused others because of witnessing and experiencing it. I had womanized because of rarely witnessing someone cherishing a woman. I had, I had, I had… Every problem that I was currently experiencing had a ‘paper trail’. It was not my fault, that I was so bitter, resentful, angry, and unforgiving. It was the fault of the parties who were to support and protect me. I was a child and a child should never endure some of the things that I did. There is truth in this statement; however, I was now a young man, who desperately needed some serious deliverance from all the current personal issues. ‘Pointing the finger’ at authority figures was not changing my outcome. It wasn’t until I started to let go of life letdowns that I began to change in a positive manner.

Choosing to do so was not easy, as there were constant reminders of pain and disappointments. The mistakes made as a child, teenager, and young adult had to be forgiven, as well. There had been many people that suffered the wrath of my selfishness. The selfishness was directly from self-pity from my own personal disappointments. The longer I thought ‘poor me, poor life, missed opportunities, etc.’… the more I self destructed and damaged the lives of others who cared about me or were involved in my life. This is what I learned most about unforgiveness, that is, it will (not may) adversely affect every relationship, including your personal relationship with children and spouse. It’s difficult for someone to understand unless they have similar life experiences; however, the reality is, we all have been not so forgiving at a time in our life.

A stereotypical product of unforgiveness is the common bully. In most cases, someone has teased the bully. The bully became insecure. Due to the bully's own insecurities, he/she responds in mistreating less fortunate individuals. The bully acts in a non-constructive way causing him to not reach his full potential. A constructive way would be to forgive his predator, no matter the offense, so that he may be released from the mental anguish and establish a positive mindset. You may say, ‘that is so elementary and easy to do’ or’ ‘I have tried it… it does not work’. You may even say, ‘I will never forgive the wrongdoing… That was just plain wicked, what was done to me.’ Maybe what you have not heard, no matter your current situation, is that Jesus Christ through the Holy Spirit will grant you the power to forgive. Jesus Christ died that you may have eternal life in God’s presence along with giving you abilities through the Holy Spirit to accomplish His will. His will is for you to be Christ-like and forgive! He understands.

In being a sacrifice, He was innocent of the accusations. While being crucified, He forgave his accusers and punishers of the wrongdoings. If we desire to be free to perform God’s will and receive His ultimate blessing, we must do the same. As Jesus provided the example to forgive and fulfill His calling, make a decision today to release the offender and walk in God’s completeness.

If you desire to have a relationship with Jesus Christ, click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyAndTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_With_God.aspx

The Right Source

2009-12-08T20:16:00.004-06:00

The other day, my devotional emphasized the importance of specific prayer. To place certainty in your request by carefully evaluating your heart’s desire and needs. A reference was made to the story of Bartimaeus, the blind man who recognized Jesus at Jericho (Mark 10:46-52). Bartimaeus had been sitting by the ‘roadside begging’ when he heard that Jesus was in town. He began obnoxiously shouting to Jesus and begging for mercy. He was so loud, that the crowd attempted to quiet him. However, he did not stop, but continued ‘all the more’. Jesus called Bartimaeus over and asked him specifically, ‘What do you want me to do for you?’ Bartimaeus requested his eyesight. Due to his faith in Jesus Christ’s abilities to heal him, Bartimaeus sight was given. The author of the devotional expressed how Bartimaeus knew his root issue was being blind. With eyesight, he would not have to beg and could do for himself; therefore, he asked for his immediate need.

The interesting part of the passage is Jesus’ question to Bartimaeus, ‘What do you want me to do for you?’ Could Jesus not see that Bartimaeus was blind? Is it possible that Jesus asked this question because the unaware Bartimaeus had a greater need? With the information, which is noted in the Bible, we will arguably never know. There is one point that we can be certain- Bartimaeus’ faith in Christ was the key to his answered prayer.

During Bartimaeus’ blind life, he was granted the opportunity to think of how his life could improve. More than likely, he lived his life receiving his needs as the ‘town beggar.’ Possibly, this was something he wasn’t proud of, as the passage demonstrates in his anticipation of being healed. His opportunityto be healed came and he made his request to the One who could restore his sight. There was a time in my life, which I played the role of Bartimaeus. Desperate for healing, begging for love and acceptance, only to realize that I was begging the wrong source. After recognizing my disappointments and heartaches, I placed my faith in the right source (Jesus). Even after doing this, my requests were immature and lacked wisdom; however, I had the right Source. Jesus Christ, in all his infinite wisdom, has tremendously blessed me and continues to do so; yet, I’m confident that I still make immature request. His grace and mercy combined with my willingness to humbly serve and trust Him grants life.

I strongly encourage you to call on the name of Jesus. The Bible states that Jesus Christ’… is the same yesterday and today and forever’ (Hebrews 13:8). No matter what the situation you face today, He can rescue you as He did me and Bartimaeus. Being that He was tempted in every way without sinning (Hebrews 4:15), He has the ability to sympathize and understand you. The time is now for you to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Savior. His ability to change your life is unlimited. Allow the power of God through Christ to transform you. Do not be ashamed or concerned with friends or family’s thoughts of your choice. As Bartimaeus unapologetically exclaimed the name of Jesus, you do the same and receive the gift of salvation and abundant life!

Numbers 23:19-20
God is not a man, that he should lie, nor a son of man, that he should change his mind. Does he speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfill? I have received a command to bless; he has blessed, and I cannot change it.

If you would like to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour, please click on this hyperlink.

Thankful

2009-11-26T13:19:00.021-06:00

Psalm 105:1
Give thanks to the LORD, call on his name; make known among the nations what he has done.

In November 1975 through 1992, I spent Thanksgiving with (what seemed like at the time), 1000 family members. With uncles and aunts numbering into double digits, there were plenty of cousins to play, jokes to ‘crack’, hugs to give, and pies and cakes to eat.

In November 1996, I celebrated a college basketball tournament championship with some boys from Texas. One of my teammates’ mom cooked us food similar to my family’s traditional Thanksgiving dinner.

In November 1999, I was invited to eat Thanksgiving dinner with my bosses’ family. His mom was a very loving woman who loved the Lord and lived a Christian lifestyle. It showed through her children’s actions and love for her/their family. I credit her son (my boss) as my first male Christian role model, who played an integral role in me committing my life to Christ.

In November 2003, my friendly neighbor invited me to spend Thanksgiving with her family. I choose to stay home, due to feeling that I wouldn’t ‘fit in’ and make her family uncomfortable on a day, which they should be comfortable. Two years later, I started dating my neighbor, married her, and spent Thanksgiving with the new family. I was loved and accepted.

In November 2009, I will spend Thanksgiving with my wife and my two sons. For the first time, we will cook (smoke) a turkey, side dishes, and desserts without any physical assistance from parents or grandparents. There will be no extended relatives to provide a source of entertainment or an ‘extra hand’. We will be alone, together.

The hardest emotional time in my life, by far, was when I was a single college student 12 hours away from my immediate and extended family. Holidays intensified the emotions of loneliness. It encouraged me to think about my future, family traditions I would create, my future wife and children, and my life. That season of my life has now passed and what I thought about yesterday is today. I’m living it! Instead of looking ahead, I’m reflecting. I’m thankful!

I’m thankful that when I was ‘little’, my family demonstrated love through cooking dishes that I now crave on turkey day. I’m thankful that my ‘Big Momma’ didn’t allow me to depart the dinner table until I was completely filled with food. I’m thankful that my mom provided an example by serving her community, family, and friends during Thanksgiving holiday. I’m thankful that my father delivered firewood with the possibility of not being paid during Thanksgiving season to the needy. I’m thankful that my grandfather would openly pray to Jesus Christ before Thanksgiving dinner. I’m thankful that my grandmother would have the most leftover sweets at her house, days following Thanksgiving. I’m thankful to realize that their spirits will continue living in me.

Today, I’m thankful for my beautiful wife. From the day we were introduced, she has been a loyal, great friend. I’m thankful for the choices she makes for the betterment of our family. I’m thankful for our future together. I’m thankful for my oldest son’s quirkiness, which is a reflection of his time spent with odd parents. I’m thankful for my baby son’s ability to get everyone’s attention with his loud powerful voice. I’m thankful that I see a future in Christian ministry for my entire family.

I’m thankful that I allowed Jesus Christ to rescue me from my madness in my early adulthood. I’m thankful that I recognized His ability to change my life. I’m thankful that He’s made me ‘cool’ to my kids and wife in an unworldly way. I’m thankful that He’s given me something to ‘look forward’. I’m thankful that I finally have the courage to openly confess Him to the world without a care or concern of judgment.

Be Thankful & Have a Happy Thanksgiving!

1 Thessalonians 5:9
For God did not appoint us to suffer wrath but to receive salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ.

Your Physical Health and Marriage

2009-11-14T08:30:00.009-06:00

1 Corinthians 7:4
The wife's body does not belong to her alone but also to her husband. In the same way, the husband's body does not belong to him alone but also to his wife.

Taking the words of many preachers, ‘That (sermon) will preach!’ I’m a part-time personal trainer and group fitness instructor. Being physically fit is my lifestyle! Being passionate and capable of helping others reach their fitness goals is a joy and blessing. There’s reward in hearing a client’s testimony of their spouse’s praise of their new outlook on life and body transformation. It’s dual rewarding. The client feels, looks, and reacts better; in return, there spouse is positively effected in many ways. There’s purpose in pushing a person to reach their physical fitness potential.

2 Timothy 3:16 states that all scripture is God inspired and profitable for correcting and instructing towards righteousness. 1 Corinthians 7:4 demonstrates God inspiring Paul to inform husbands and wives that there bodies belong not only to them, but their spouse. In the ‘do what feel goods and what’s best for me’ post-modern society which we reside, a few words regarding this matter can be greeted with a mental embrace or ‘slap’. Our western society is full of overweight people with bad diets and exercise habits to follow. A subject that is lightly covered in the Christian community. In my opinion, it’s a major obstacle in marital happiness. I did not say ‘joy’, which is something that can not be taken away, but the emotions connected to being happy. Excited to see your spouse naked, truly proud of yourself/your spouse when walking into a room and admiring yourself/them in a new outfit or swimsuit is questionably non-existent in our Christian culture. When we marry regardless of how our spouse looks, hopefully, we have decided to love our significant other through ‘thick and thin’. How nice is it when the latter part (thin) of this saying applies? As we age, many different changes happen to our bodies. However, we are responsible to diet and exercise in preventing diseases and stress which plays an integral role in prematurely ending many believers’ lives.

This is not about your weight or looking sexier, but developing a healthier lifestyle that is pleasing to you, your spouse, and the Lord. A lifestyle that promotes togetherness through the act of serving your spouse and the Lord in taking a walk, reducing your fat intake, experiencing Yoga, or eating oatmeal for breakfast. By doing this, you will provide a healthy example for your areas of influence (children, co-workers, and peers). Your confidence will soar; due to obedience of not conforming to the worldly eating and physical health patterns (Romans 12:1-2). The benefits of healthy eating and consistent exercising are unlimited in impacting your marriage.

There’s a reason for every scripture. Carefully meditating on 1 Corinthians 7:4 should inspire the most selfish spouse to begin and maintain a healthier lifestyle. Regardless of your feelings, you owe it to the Lord, your wife/husband, and yourself. Trust me the journey is rewarding and beneficial.

Get off the roof!

2009-11-12T16:45:00.004-06:00

2 Samuel 11:1-5
In the spring, at the time when kings go off to war, David sent Joab out with the king's men and the whole Israelite army... But David remained in Jerusalem. One evening David got up from his bed and walked around on the roof of the palace. From the roof he saw a woman bathing. The woman was very beautiful, and David sent someone to find out about her. The man said, "Isn't this Bathsheba, the daughter of Eliam and the wife of Uriah the Hittite?" Then David sent messengers to get her. She came to him, and he slept with her. Then she went back home. The woman conceived and sent word to David, saying, "I am pregnant."

I heard an older lady speaking on the radio, while I was driving back from work, one day. Her voice was crackling and oozing with words of wisdom. She told many different stories throughout her speech. One that stuck with me most was about a young man (let’s call him, Tim). When the story took place, Tim was in college. It was Valentine’s Day and he was in pursuit for a gift for his girlfriend. The story led Tim and a friend pulling up to a hotel to meet their girlfriends. The night was going well with board games, laughter, etc. Later in the night, Tim excused himself to the bathroom. After returning, he entered a dim-lighted room with only his girlfriend present. As he looked closer, he also noticed all his girlfriend’s clothes on the floor. Tim stated at this moment, he had three thoughts: 1-Run! 2-His parent’s faces of disappointment, if he choose to have sex, and 3-A scripture (1 Corinthians 10:13) that his youth pastor made him remember. So what did Tim do? He fretfully ran, went to his door room, and called his father, while crying. My immediate thoughts were ‘Did this really happen? Did he really run, while crying and being afraid?’ David was a man after God’s own heart (1 Samuel 13:14) and he did not run. He chose to take advantage of the situation. He used his resources to inquire, gathered information, and made a decision. My purpose is not to bash David, but to point out the significance of Tim’s decision to not have sex.

There are many things to gather from this unbelievable, yet strongly Christian witnessed story; however, I will only mention a few. First, Tim’s discernment has to be questioned. It is very difficult to believe that he was surprised that his girlfriend would become naked and provoke sex. Proverbs 1:20 (a book written by David) states that ‘wisdom calls aloud in the street…’ Apparently, it was calling Tim and this was the time that he chose to listen. Whether Tim recognized it or not, he took advice from a man (David) who had lost this battle, but learned valuably. The Holy Spirit will direct and guide you in these manners and keep you from being caught in such a situation, if you listen sooner than later. Kudos to Tim for running; although, I’m a firm believer that if we initially ‘count the cost’, God will reveal where you are headed.

Second, Tim had another Christian (his dad) to confide. The importance of a good friend who practices Christian principles in such a time is critical. Let’s say Tim ran away went home and didn’t have anyone to call to confirm his wise, Christian decision. There’s a strong chance that he would be in the situation again or allow his manhood to be questioned by a worldly society. Support is supreme in our growth as Christians. Do not take for granted your Christian brothers and sisters. The moral of the second point is simple, ‘you need a solid, trustworthy, reliable, Bible believing Christian friend and church (Hebrews 10:25)!’ If you don’t have one (church and friend), pray for and diligently seek one.

Third, David, the great king who committed adultery, was credited for writing ‘I have hidden your word in my heart that I might not sin against you (Psalms 119:11)' more than likely after his incident. Tim practiced the same principle. He was encouraged to remember a scripture, which the Holy Spirit helped recall. I believe it’s safe to say, that his faith in God’s promise helped him escape. Parents: it’s important that we see the importance of our children having mentors. You will reap what you sow! (Galatians 6:7). Invest in your child’s relationships through active participation and foster Christian relationships by modeling the behavior. Monkey see, monkey do!

So how do we avoid being in the situation, that David and Tim found themselves? We do what we are called to do. David was not doing his kingly duty, which was the start of the problem. We consistently pray for wisdom and discernment in the small decisions. Once God provides peace and reveals the outcome with clarity (1 Corinthians 14:33), Run or in other words, ‘Get off the roof!’

Bad Company corrupts Good Character

2009-11-02T17:11:00.039-06:00

1 Corinthians 15:33
Do not be misled: "Bad company corrupts good character."

Proverbs 27:17
As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.

When I first rededicated my life to Jesus Christ, practicing 1 Corinthians 15:33 was extremely difficult. At this time in my life, I was sleeping with someone (who was not my wife), trying to make a relationship not founded on Christian principles work, sharing an apartment with friends who didn’t make a habit of practicing Christianity, and pursuing things that were not spiritually or emotionally fulfilling. After becoming completely frustrated and overwhelmed by the aforementioned, I self-reflected. My discoveries pointed to my way of thinking (thoughts and perceptions). I had allowed different things in my life to adversely affect the way I saw marriage, money, women, authority, career, etc. It was not only my association with people, but with the media (television, movies, music, magazines, etc.) that caused such an unfulfilling outlook on my future. The world’s system of thinking and believing was becoming a major part of my thought process.

Whether you are to agree with this or not, what we are ‘around’ influences our life. Have you ever did something you did or did not like and think ‘dang it, I’m just like my dad (or mom)!’ I would be willing to bet my paycheck (if you are over 30 years of age with a child) that you have. This is totally natural and it basically ‘boils down’ to basic math. You have spent more than half of your life with your parents. Parental influence plays a significant role in our development as an adult and more so, a Christian. The relevancy of mentioning the influence of a parent is that the same principle applies in our selection of close friends and media outlets. If you are reading this blog, you are capable of choosing what you will watch, hear, and read, as well as, who you will be allowing in your ‘circle’. You have some control of your future! The best way to begin is reading the Bible to understand who you are as a child of God. Entertainment and friendships are great; however, if it is contrary to your growth as a believer, it is simply a sin. The beginning step to a more peaceful and prosperous life is your obedience to the Word of God. I do understand the difficulty of ending a relationship; I have experienced this on several occasions. It’s typically never easy whether you are the ‘breaker’ or the ‘broken’. However, if you desire the life that God has promised you, this must be done. Hopefully, as you get older in years, letting the unfruitful go will become easier than harder. Life will motivate you! Getting married, raising children, and becoming a leader in your God-given calling are ways in which you can demonstrate your Christ likeness. If you are demonstrating your character in any other way, your lifestyle will hurt those you love and lead. In return, their life will be affected and the cycle will continue. You play a role in ending the negative cycle, today!

Begin practicing Proverbs 27:17 and select company which will help you become God’s vision for your life. Remember, that no one is perfect, but Jesus Christ. We are made perfect in Him (1 Colossians 1:28). Seek close relationships with those who desire to grow in their walk with the Lord. Commonalities are important. Do not neglect the natural in being overly spiritual. Being equal yoked is the goal (2 Corinthians 6:14)! There’s a chance that you may be stronger in your faith than some of your Christian friends. My encouragement to you is simple. Romans 14:1 states that we should accept those who faith is weak without passing judgment. Just make sure their ‘faith’ is in Jesus and that there is substance of being a Christian (Galatians 5:22). If you allow, the Holy Spirit will guide you in these important matters. Think ‘outside the box’ in regards to your growth as a Christian. Pray and ask God to make you aware of your association with ‘stumbling blocks’. More than likely as you read this blog, you are aware of what they may be. I encourage you to do your part in drawing near to God for direction. He promises to help (James 4:8). Become an overall healthy person according to the Word of God and watch the blessings of God overtake you.

Share your life!

2009-10-20T04:43:00.008-05:00

John 15:13
Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends.

When I re-dedicated my life to the Lord, I can remember this scripture 'jumping out' at me. It instantly became my favorite scripture. The scripture placed many things into perspective for me in defining Christianity. I thought if I could be a 'good enough' friend that I could place my friendships second to my relationship to Christ, then most (probably all) of my friendships would be in great shape. I can honestly say, that from the point, I have not had any major rifts in my friendships. Each person that I called a friend, lives became more important to me. I invested in hearing their thoughts, worries, concerns, and hopes; helping them in ways that build them up; and encouraged them to trust in God, etc. I have always prided myself in being a better than average friend. I have had the honor of being the best man in three weddings. My point in saying all this is that, it has carried over into who I am, today. Before my wife and I were married, we were friends. She was there for me and I for her. Being friends before dating allowed us to be transparent in expressing our beliefs, likes/dislikes, family values, weaknesses/strengths, desires, etc. Without knowing it at the time, it allow us to develop a foundation which has been critical to our marital success, today. The scripture mentioned above illustrates how we are to be towards friends. My purpose in acknowledging is that we are to especially be this way for our spouse. If you are not best friends, take the time and become best friends. I encourage you to share your dreams, hopes, ideas, and real life every day experiences with one another. It helps bond you for a lifetime. To not share with your spouse is unChristian in the sense that Christ wants you to share your thoughts with Him. Sharing creates intimacy. You are one connected by the blood of Christ. The more you share your life, the more you practice the principle outlined in the scripture above. The devil desires to kill, steal, and destroy your marital relationship. Begin laying down your life today by being present and active (physically, emotionally, spiritually, and financially) and verbally share with your most precious gift of God, your spouse. This is why this gift was given to you!

You are the farmer!

2009-09-26T17:39:00.015-05:00

You are the farmer! from The Seminary DropOut on Vimeo.

Foundation Scripture

Mark 4:14 The farmer sows the word.

How do we sow? With words and actions

A smart farmer will ensure that his soil is adequate ground for the type of seed he plans to plant. There are conditions, in which a seed will grow, stagnate, reach optimal growth, and/or surpass expectations. It is our job to foster the environment for an expected return.

Examples of the four (4) relationships and the ground they create (Mark 4:13-20):

Pathway Relationship Hear the Word and immediately, it’s gone! Mark 4:15

You may or may not desire to have a relationship with child and/or spouse, but lack the discipline to sustain a solid relationship. No true commitment has been made. Your emotional connection and follow-through regarding your child and/or spouse is non-existent. Therefore, your child doesn’t trust what you say, because of your actions.

Rocky Relationship Accept, welcome, and rejoice! Endure for awhile, but not long because of no root. Mark 4:16-17

You desire to have a relationship with child and/or spouse, but lack the discipline to sustain a solid relationship. No commitment has been made. You have an emotional connection, but your follow-through regarding your child and/or spouse is non-existent. Therefore, your child doesn’t trust what you say, because of your actions.

Inconsistent Relationship Hear the Word, but cares, anxieties, and distractions of the world suffocate the Word and it produces no result. Mark 4:18-19

You have a relationship with child and/or spouse, but lack the discipline to sustain a solid relationship. No commitment has been made. You have an emotional connection, but your follow-through regarding your child and/or spouse is inconsistent. Therefore, your child doesn’t trust what you say, because of your actions.

Good Relationship Hear and receive the Word and produce fruit. Mark 4:20

You have established and maintained a solid relationship with child and/or spouse. A commitment has been made. You have an emotional connection and your follow-through regarding your child and/or spouse is consistent. Therefore, your child trusts what you say, because of your actions.

If you desire to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and accept Him as your Lord and Savior, click on the link below.

www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyandTheology/Discipleship/Steps_To_Peace_With_God.aspx

Renewing your Mind to the Word of God

2009-09-12T14:08:00.021-05:00

Renewing Your Mind to the Word of God from The Seminary Dropout on Vimeo.

Romans 12 (NIV)
2Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

How do you conform to this world? Complaining about your current situation to people… This is not Biblically compliant. The Bible informs us tells us to be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving present your requests to God. Philippians 4:6 The Bible speaks of approaching the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need. Hebrews 4:16

Transformation takes place by meditating on God’s commandments and promises.

How to renew your mind? I believe you first begin with an honest prayer of submission to the Lord. Believe in faith that God will help you change your current viewpoints that are contrary to the Word of God. What does God say about your current situation?

How do you know what the will of God is? Have you ever prayed for something, not having complete confidence that God would answer your prayer? Studying the Bible will help in these areas of confusion and frustration. God is very clear in his will for humanity. Our salvation is His will through Jesus Christ. How do I know this? It’s in the Bible. John 3:16

Raising children… Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it. Proverbs 22:6 Finances Malachi 3:6-12, selecting friends 1 Corinthians 15:33, what I say Matthew 12:35-37, and future Jeremiah 29:11.

If you desire to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and accept Him as your Lord and Savior, click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyandTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_with_God.aspx
Keep it Righteous!

Wife submit to your husband!

2009-08-31T13:14:00.015-05:00

Wife submit to your husband! from The Seminary Dropout on Vimeo.

Foundation Scriptures
Ephesians 5
22Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. 23For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.

Genesis 2
18 The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."

We (husbands) need your emotional support, encouragement, unconditional love, and undying love in our abilities to fulfill our destiny.

Points/Questions
Why do you think the Bible addresses husbands to love their wives and for wives to respect their husbands? Ephesians 5:33 Could it be that men generally need to feel respected in order to feel loved? Men, feel loved and appreciated through respect.

The Bible doesn’t state wives, if your husband is a Christian or lives a Christian lifestyle, submit to him. You are commanded to submit to your husband regardless of any matter. This is possible by taking yourself out the equation.

Would you openly disrespect a police officer? Definitely not, due to his authority. According to the Bible, your husband authority over you is directly correlated to Christ’s authority over the Church. If you are not respecting your husband in this manner and truly revere the Lord, you will openly repent and apologize to your husband.

What things are you to submit to your husband? Everything!

What does the ‘head’ mean? The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. The Message (Ephesians 5:23)

Ephesians 5:22-24 (The Message)
22-24Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ. The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. So just as the church submits to Christ as he exercises such leadership, wives should likewise submit to their husbands.

Men, God is calling us to lead. Nothing has changed from Old Testament times to this present day. You are the key agent to your family. Encouragement: Stop passing responsibilities to your wife, that God has commanded you to perform.

Benefits
• Learning to lead
• Obedience to Scripture
• Husbands, learn how to love wife as Christ love Church
• Remove unnecessary burdens that women were not made to carry

If you desire to have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ and accept Him as your Lord and Savior, click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyandTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_With_God.aspx

What are you seeking?

2009-08-20T00:21:00.009-05:00

Welcome to my blog! I'm very excited about following God's calling. For the last four years, I have stated that there was no way for me to begin. Well, the Internet has provided an outlet. Praise the Lord! This is my third posting to this blog. I did not want to inform anyone of my endeavors until I actually had a video or audio sermon. This sermon has taken time, prayer, and patience. I finally finished a message without completely fumbling over my words. As you watch the video, you will see that I clearly struggled. With all this said, I am stepping out in faith. I pray and hope that my journey will encourage you to follow God's will for your life. This is my true intention. Please pray for my family and I as we become more radical towards serving the Lord. We will do the same for you- simply request it.

Alright, I pray for mercy and grace. Remember, this is my first message.

May God bless you and Keep it righteous!

If you are not a Christian and desire Jesus Christ to become your Lord and Savior, please follow the posted website below.

www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyandTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_With_God.aspx

Husband love your wife!

2009-08-15T14:36:00.018-05:00

Husband love your wife! from The Seminary Dropout on Vimeo.

This is my actual first message on this blog. The posting was ready on August 15th, but I had to find a place to upload a 14 minute video. YouTube and Google would not allow. Therefore, this is why the posting was delayed. Believe it or not, it took me approximately 30 attempts before I was able to 'not mess' up (completely) before its entirety.

These are small steps of faith and obedience. I'm excited and anticipate a continuous flow of God's anointing in my steps of obedience. I asked for your prayers for my wife, children, and myself. As a family, our hearts are to please God. In order to do this, there will be some things that we will have to give up. I believe God will patiently deal with us regarding these matters. He desires for us (all) to be blessed significantly. In all the ways that I have been greatly blessed; it came with a cost (sacrifice). Although, cost is not a good way to communicate, due to its negative connotation. The initial step of obedience is typically tough, but after breaking through 'the door... walking in line' became/becomes easier each day. I'm aware this act may be the same.

I hope and pray that you are encouraged by the message; that it will be a blessing to your marriage. If you are not married, I believe you still will be blessed.

If you desire to accept Jesus Christ as your Lord and Saviour, click on the link below.

http://www.cbn.com/spirituallife/BibleStudyAndTheology/Discipleship/Steps_to_Peace_With_God.aspx

May God Bless You & Keep it Righteous!

Spoken Word

2009-07-14T15:26:00.007-05:00

the video (above) is an exhortation from my old pastor. this was a very unusual day. my wife and i were sitting in the far left back row as usual. we are infamous for arriving church 10 minutes later than the start time. therefore, we always sat close to the back, due to seat availability and tardiness. also, we enjoyed our 'spot'. most church attenders will relate to this quoted phrase of 'spot'.

as you listen to the video, you will notice that the pastor is speaking to two couples that he knows before he gets to the man with a black shirt and black head (me). as he is speaking to the couples, i literally was joking with my wife that he may possibly call on her this day. so we were in a humorous mode and extremely lax at this time. to say, that we were (both) surprised is an understatement. we are totally comfortable with a prophetic word. church members were rarely exhorted and encouraged publicly in church services, so when it happens 'all eyes are on the person' in this church of 10,000 members or more. after he spoke to me, i was extremely overwhelmed. i made an effort to speak with our head pastor to no avail. i was directed to his assistant. i did take this as a sign of my insignificance. therefore, i didn't make contact with anyone at the church after this failure to meet. i have since matured. i understand the demands of a senior pastor realizing i should have met with his assistant. life has a way of humbling you and i assure you life (along with my wife) has humbled me. i look forward in God's timing of fulfilling my destiny. this is the beginning...

p.s. the photos have been scanned, so the quality is bad. most of the photos are old and not well maintained.

keep it righteous!

my story

2009-07-13T07:37:00.010-05:00

in order for you to understand my journey, you must understand my past and present (the future is my focus!). thus, bullet points will represent significants of my latter and present day to quickly 'catch you up'.

born out of wedlock to a fatherless teenaged male and a female methodist college student

raised in a quitely racially segregated town with less than a thousand in population

parental influence and family heritage- work hard and get an education

accepted Jesus Christ as my Savior at 11 years of age

Christianity was the minority faith of same race peers

discovered basketball as my venue to fulfilling some dreams

began dating out of my race at 15

lost my virginity at 16

moved from a midwestern state to a southern state at 19 years of age to complete college education

engaged to marry at 21 to opposite race female

experienced my first true intended encounter of racism at 21

physically abused fiancee causing a break in engagement and breakup of relationship

accepted Jesus Christ as my Lord at 22 years of age

enrolled in seminary at 24 years of age & dropped out at 25 years of age

married opposite race female at 29 years of age

adopted a 3 year old multi-racial boy at 29 years age

witnessed the birth of my second son at 32 years of age

moved to the 4th largest metroplex in the nation with hopes of providing real life experiences and better opportunities for my sons, wife, and self

some may read the above and ask why did he mention this or that. the truth of the matter, is this is, what came to mind as i typed. as you follow this blog, you will witness raw, sincere vulnerability and transparency. there will be times when my postings may seem a bit harsh or politically incorrect. my apology to this... i am to be a man of God-Jesus Christ. i have clearly discovered in the last two weeks that my faith is limited in certain areas of my Christian walk. i desire to overcome these obstacles by attacking my fears with relentless pursuit to conquer. because i'm a Christian, regardless of an official calling, i have been commanded to '...go and make disciples of all nations... Matthew 28:19 NIV.' at this time in my life, i am not intentionally doing that. this blog is '...me intentionally doing that'. i hope to be bold, courageous, considerate, and loving in my pursuits. i hope to inspire you and draw you closer to God through Jesus Christ. i hope to have accountability through the relationship of others (Chrisitans and non-believers) to fulfill my Godly specific calling. Okay, let's begin...

keep it righteous!