Standing to The Star-Spangled Banner

Lately, I’ve been having many blunt conversations with my oldest son about sex, race, religion, politics, and relationships. I’ve come to the conclusion that what I value most (my faith) is what I pray and hope will transfer into a way of life for him. In trying to connect with him, I’ve used countless examples. Some ‘hit’, while other analogies clearly missed the mark. He has expressed a genuine interest in my personal history. As a matter of fact, his little brother and he constantly ask me to tell them a story during dinner.

The other day, I pitched an idea to have a Christmas play at our house, possibly in the garage or indoors. Of course, the play was going to be about Jesus with a comical spin intending to entertain and encourage our neighbors. Nothing sacrilegious, but a God honoring rendition of the ‘reason for the season’. Needless to say, they ‘shot it down’. Our eldest verbally expressed that mentioning Jesus may be offensive to some people and that it was a private matter.

Say what?!?

He went on to say that his school asked them if they wanted to make holiday cards, which he decided he did. While making the cards, he states his teacher instructed them not to write ‘Merry Christmas’ on the card; due to a possibly of offending some recipients, who may not celebrate Christmas. Our assumption is he translated her words into thinking that mentioning Jesus Christ in public was offensive.

As many Sunday schools, Christian camps, open expressions of Christian faith, Christian prayers, and bible verses, my son have experienced; he still was influenced into believing his faith wasn’t a matter to be demonstratively expressed.This opened the door to share a childhood story.

Being quite the odd ball in school, I had a tough time connecting with the “cool” kids. Thank God for sports, because it sincerely was my saving grace; although, athletics did bring its challenges. The overall biggest trial for me was the pre-game ritual of standing to the Star-Spangled Banner. In my community, Christianity wasn’t the primary faith. Differentiating from my family's culture, the prevalent religion didn’t stand for the playing of the United States’ national anthem – they sat. So hearing, ‘Oh, say can you see…’ before every game, sometimes created more anxiety than the actual game.

One time, while visiting a rival high school game with some classmates, I chose not to stand during the playing of the national anthem. I remember feeling extremely awkward; as it was my culture to revere this national hymn.  I decided from that point, if placed in the predicament again, that I would stand. In my adolescent mind, there was no righteous cause or purpose – other than, it was very unnatural for me. The awkwardness to sit outweighed the awkwardness to stand. Although, my culture was the minority in my small town; it was sufficient to encourage me to stand (pun intended). I pray that my children will encounter the same conviction to ‘stand’ for God.

Jesus Christ commissioned Christians to make disciples.  Will this ever get accomplished, if we are quiet and politically correct in our actions and words? I would argue that it’s virtually impossible.

In the past week, I have visited with and heard from several Christians who are upset about the re-election of President Barack Obama. In addition, I’ve read some unbelievable anti-Obama Facebook and Twitter post. My thought process behind this all is… ‘Do you really believe your emotional ‘shoot from the hip’ reaction to the presidential election is going to change the world?’ The likelihood of someone altering their point of view or religious belief from being called ‘dumb, uninformed, baby killer, and ungodly’ is highly doubtful. Yet it seems, a common way of expression for dislike. This clearly is not an effective way to communicate, positively influence, or lead anyone. Furthermore, Jesus Christ modeled no behaviors which promote these actions. Instead, he affectionately served his ‘circle of influence’ in every way possible -- allowing his actions and words to bring about change. At times, he may have spoken in parables; however, his intentions and instructions were clear.

How does this relate to you? Personally, I have a great opportunity. My children will face faith oppositions throughout their school years and beyond. As the leader of my home, I must showcase Christianity consistently and boldly. If I never demonstrate my faith, then bash my children for their inactions; there’s a strong probability that they would turn with ‘deaf ears’.

Being proactive is key. Identify problems before they occur is difficult; however, wisdom points to your lack of involvement and root causes. Jesus Christ wasn’t passive aggressive – he was direct. He was focused and committed. People knew his principles. I believe we should be the same. Most recoveries take place when Christians are intentional and purpose driven. When our ‘circle of influence’ responds in a way that is contrary to our faith, we should ask ourselves, “What am I constructively doing to make a difference?” If you are not deliberately doing anything, it’s possible that you are violating a direct commandment given by Jesus Christ.

Get involve and allow your action and words to speak God’s will! Don’t have a seat, when God has directed you to stand. Proactive boldness should be a characteristic of the Christian culture, not reactive boldness. Remember, God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life.  Therefore, anyone who rejects… instruction does not reject a human being but God…

If you feel an urge to recommit or commit your life to God’s will, please select the link below.

Commit for the 1^st time –

http://www.intouch.org/you/all-things-are-new/content?topic=how_do_i_accept_jesus_as_my_savior_all_things

Commit to SERVE –

http://www.intouch.org/you/all-things-are-new/content?topic=does_god_really_want_me_to_serve_all_things

“Hey dad, there’s beer in the fridge!”

If you are a follower of my blog, you are aware that I have occasionally exalted my parent’s; however, they were not perfect. In the most honorable and respectable way that I can say this, my dad was an alcoholic. I place much emphasis on ‘WAS’, because while I was in college, he completely discontinued drinking. Unfortunately during my childhood, he did not provide the best example of ‘what is considered’ healthy alcohol consumption. Due to this, I believe, an unhealthy view of drinking was developed.  I have always been ‘wishy-washy’ towards social drinking.  

When our oldest son was younger, my wife and I chose to call any type of alcoholic drink - grown folk’s juice. He would ask, ‘Hey, what are you drinking? May I have some?’ Our consistent reply… ‘No, you can’t. This is grown folk’s juice’. As he has become older, we didn’t hide the occasional wine bottle or mixed drink. However, he has never seen beer in the fridge. The other day while grabbing a few items at a local Wal-Mart, I came across the beer cooler. A desire quickly crossed my mind and I followed my thought to purchase a six-pack of 8 ounce Coors Light (I’m a lightweight!). After drinking two, I pulled the other four from the freezer and placed them in the fridge. The very next day, while I was outside tending our flower bed, my oldest son opened the garage’s entry door and yelled “Hey dad, there’s beer in the fridge!” Immediately, I was embarrassed and thought, “Great, son... Thanks for sharing… Would you like to mention how I backed up the toilet, too?” However, instead of yelling at my kid, my wife and I decided to use this as an opportunity to visit with him about alcohol. 

We discovered that my son judged me based on his discovery of beer. He felt that I (we) shouldn’t drink at all. We were surprised by his judgment. Mostly, our amazement centered around his views on alcohol. We’ve never taught condemnation of drinking; as a matter of fact, we did the exact opposite. We drank wine and margaritas in his presence; however, he has never witnessed us drunk or hosting parties including drinking.  

I did my best explanation of how ‘a drink’ was not considered a sin and closed the dispute acknowledging his entitlement to his own views. My only saving grace was reflecting on his love for soft drinks. One day, after witnessing his onslaught of ‘suicides’, his mom and I limited him to a one cup (filled with ice) soft drink per outing. Even after explaining soda’s lack of nutritional value, he continues. At an early age, he was taught that soft drinks are liquid candy to simply be enjoyed as a treat. I informed him that alcohol was the same, but for adults over the age of 21. Thankfully, he didn’t bring up its mind altering affects because my argument possibly would have been highly ineffective.

Now, I’m processing our conversation.  What comes to mind is 1 Corinthians 14:33, which refers to God not being associated with confusion. The bible passage includes this scripture within God’s instruction for orderly worship. Here are more scriptures that come to mind: 1 Corinthians 10:31-33. These three verses encouraged the following: 1. whatever you eat, drink, or do – do all to the glory of God, 2. cause no one to stumble in their faith by your actions, and 3. allow what you do to lead others to Christ. This group of scriptures was under ‘Do all to the Glory of God’ section. Combining the subtitle of these two passages, Orderly Worship + Do all to the Glory of God, I’m wrestling with a different conclusion.

My wife and kids are well aware of my passions towards allowing the bible to govern our life. I would have to admit that it would be quite hypocritical to not allow my spirit to be transformed by these scriptures. Also, I believe that I would be doing my son a huge disservice by not revisiting this issue. Although, I still do not believe that ‘a drink’ will send you to hell. I now have a different point of view. My consistent goal is to align my spirit with God’s view. To accomplish a level of worship and actions that is pleasing to Him. Based on what I read and my son’s drinking perception, I have some serious praying and decision making to do.

The first step to aligning your will with God’s will is accepting His way of salvation.
http://www.intouch.org/resources/all-things-are-new/content/topic/how_do_i_accept_jesus_as_my_savior_all_things

The Walking Dead

The other night, I searched through Netflix looking for a new series to watch. I love suspense-filled dramas and action, so typically I look in these genres first. I stumbled across a 4.5 star rated television series, The Walking Dead. The show description seemed interesting and worthy of my ‘lying in the bed’ downtime; so I gave it ‘a shot’. Wow! It provided quite the entertainment. By the second episode, I was intensely grabbing my phone with sweaty hands, while kicking my feet and loudly calling the victims ‘fools’ for not doing what I told them.


After my wife had completed her nightly ritual, she jumped in bed, leaned over for a goodnight kiss, and quietly asked if I wanted to pray. Absolutely, it’s the norm. We always start with thanksgiving, and then move to specific requests of needs for us and others. Occasionally, we will pray for a good night’s sleep; as I did this particular night. Well, guess what, I didn’t sleep well at all. For some strange reason, I dreamt of zombies all night. “Come on God, I prayed for rest. Why didn’t you deliver ‘God of Peace’? I had to work all day on 6 hours of interrupted sleep.”

Rhetorical question alert: Why was my prayer for rest not fulfilled?

I was delusional to thought that sleep would be peaceful. My mental state was affected by a bad decision. There’s no way of reaping long-term benefits from polluting your mind, body, spirit, soul, and relationships. Prayer isn’t a guaranteed solution to override bad choices. However, godly living can prevent most, if not all, miserable results.

If you desire health in any area of your life, start with foundational principles which lead to success. Verbally professing a conditional promise of God (scripture) with contradicting actions is pointless. Yes, faith is the substance of things hope for; however, praying for (something) when your lifestyle reflects (nothing) is absurd. For example, overindulging in areas, which God has given us freedom through Jesus Christ to enjoy, can lead to death/disaster. There are so many examples which I could provide from my own past mistakes to current ones. We daily face crossroads were the decision to place God’s foundation first is optional. Not knowing what the bible says about life is a personal problem. In life, ignorance is not bliss. What you don’t know – can hurt you. You may be praying for something, that the bible has already informed is the opposite will of God. Yet, your lack of discipline to get the information you need is holding you back from acting on and receiving God’s promise.

According to Genesis, God breathe his life into man and he became a living creature. God is still breathing through his word (the Bible). If you are not allowing it to change your lifestyle, you could become ‘The Walking Dead’.

Start here for foundation regarding your spiritual health.
http://www.intouch.org/resources/all-things-are-new/content/topic/how_do_i_accept_jesus_as_my_savior_all_things

A Slow Progression

Last night I read a story about an ex-pastor who turned atheist. Quite frankly, I was not surprised by the article, but more mindful of a statement. When asked about her loss of faith, she responded,”… it was very, very gradual. Actually there's not really one single moment where I can look back and say ah, that was the moment. It was kind of a slow progression.”


After reading her reasoning, I almost discontinued reading the article because the remaining words seemed redundant. I immediately recognized that this can happen too many, including myself. No one is free from losing their faith. Inactivity in pursuing an on-going relationship with God is a surefire precursor for disbelief of Scripture. Plenty of analogies and life stories are relevant in proving this as fact.

Every man and woman is daily granted the opportunity to serve the Lord through their actions and words. The more faith you have in God, the more apt you are to please Him. The ‘slow progression’ begins with your actions of disbelief. If you believe God is a rewarder of those who diligently seek him- you are going to seek Him! If you believe God gives grace to the humble and mocks the proud – you more than likely will not be too boastful! If you believe that anyone who does not provide for his household is worse than an unbeliever- you are going to provide! The list goes on.

Becoming an atheist starts with deciding to do the opposite of what God says without expecting consequences. It’s hard to argue belief in God, while living a life contrary of His encouragements. Without faith, it’s impossible to please Him. Sometimes, there are no proofs – simply scripture and the guidance of His Spirit. Your trust combined with actions determines your belief status. Faith alone is not enough.

James 2:19-24 (Amplified Version) reads the following:

You believe that God is one… So do the demons believe and shudder…!


Are you willing to be shown, you foolish fellow, that faith apart from works is inactive and ineffective and worthless?


Was not our forefather Abraham justified (made acceptable to God) by [his] works when he brought to the altar as an offering his [own] son Isaac?


You see that [his] faith was cooperating with his works, and [his] faith was completed and reached its supreme expression [when he implemented it] by [good] works.


And [so] the Scripture was fulfilled that says, Abraham believed in (adhered to, trusted in, and relied on) God, and this was accounted to him as righteousness (as conformity to God’s will in thought and deed), and he was called God’s friend.


You see that a man is justified (pronounced righteous before God) through what he does and not alone through faith [through works of obedience as well as by what he believes].


Do not allow your faith to be mocked by your actions. Choose to grow in the Lord by better understanding and acting on His word. It’s truthfully better to take small steps towards him that thoughtlessly ‘backpedaling’ away from Him.

Stay alert and encouraged!

The Whistleblower

For 4 years now, our street has hosted an annual spring block party. Neighboring streets join us to celebrate a day of community fellowship from bounce houses, grilling, to adult and children interactive games. It’s a great way to become familiar with your neighbors, while enjoying awesome weather and eating an array of food.


Each year (mid-party), I’m allowed the opportunity to flex my inner game show host by leading the children and adults into prize-winning competitive, fun games. Contending against bounce houses is tough. Sustaining kid’s attention, while water is gushing out of a 32 feet tall by 25 feet long slide/bounce house is challenging but cool. Typically, I lose my voice; so this year, I decided to use a whistle as a signal for starting and stopping. It worked extremely well until we played musical chairs.

If you know anything about or ever played musical chairs, you know that this game is enjoyable for the audience and participants. However, it can easily become aggressive promoting children and adults to become emotionally upset. Since I didn’t properly plan, there was no stereo involved. The children moved to the tunes of my lovely whistled-out symphony.

Before we began the game, there were several practice rounds to assure every kid understood the rules. Realizing that I could be biased by supporting my two sons, I informed the audience that I would be turning my back to the ‘musical chair-ers’. Also, the audience was told that they would have to hold the children accountable to the rules of the game. If they were out, let them know. Adding my own special touch, they were also informed, ‘if they started to cry to promptly find their mom…’ Tacky I know, but it was quite hilarious because some kids actually did, including my oldest. Geez!

We began the game. Of course, the youngest children were out first. As I turned around to remove each chair, you could sense the intensity thickening and anxiety increasing. With only 5 kids remaining, parents became more verbally demonstrative. They exclaimed to me, ‘They are sitting down before you blow the whistle! They are holding on to a chair!’ So after getting down to three children, I re-did the games and reinforced the rules. Finally, I asked the crowd, ‘why do you keep telling me – tell them – hold them responsible...’ After all, they were seeing what was happening. My back was intentionally facing them. Immediately, I received inspiration for this blog.

The message is simple. If you see someone doing something that would harm them, verbally hold them accountable (in love). Please - do not wait for someone else to intervene, when you are capable. Do not back down from ‘reinforcing the rules’. If you do not have a relationship with them, but are concern about their well-being; find a way to first demonstrate love (Hebrews 12:6). After doing so, let them know that they are harming themselves. Don’t wait for ‘the whistleblower’ to expose. He will not be as nice.

Be ready when the whistle blows!
http://www.intouch.org/resources/all-things-are-new/content/topic/how_do_i_accept_jesus_as_my_savior_all_things

$250

A healthy (new) baby boy, new job in a location I strongly desired to be, new home, wife being able to become a stay at home mom… it was exciting times! Unfortunately with moving to a new city, there was a short season of staying in hotels and driving or flying home on my off days to visit my family. This was somewhat stressful, but easily manageable because I knew it was temporary.


After working many 12 hour days in a row, I was able to fly home for two days. My wife and baby son picked me up from the airport… I was very excited to see them. While driving home, my wife gave a ‘run down’ of her week. She clearly was enjoying her time away from work. Although, my wife was happy it was apparent that she had a few struggles in her new role. One scenario made this painfully clear.

Here’s my disclaimer: Sometimes, I can be a control freak. I have a habit of creating excel spreadsheets for family budgets, vacations, etc. If my wife spends a dollar, I (use to) want to know. Not really a great habit to have, when you are married to an independent woman who took care of herself and a child for two years before allowing your support. Anyways… back to the drive home from the airport.

My wife said, ‘I did something good for our family!’ Immediately, I sighed (in my heart). ‘A guy came around selling steaks in his truck and I got a deal for $250’. My immediate reply: “Really?!? Steaks out of a deep freezer from the back of pickup. Really?!? This can’t be happening. You need to give it back. Call and tell him to pick up the meat before he cashes the check. As soon as we get home!”

I was very upset. Thankfully, we had the money to fund the unnecessary purchase, but it was clearly the lack of communication and the amount paid which caused concern. I knew that my wife’s intentions were good. She really thought (and may still feel) that this was a good investment; however, the fact that we did not communicate about such a purchase upset me. Knowing our roles and sharing major decisions were seriously the biggest struggles we faced in the beginning stages of our relationship. After only 3 pre-marital counseling sessions, our counselor discerned that we would be challenged in these areas. What an understatement! With 6 years of marriage ‘under our belt’, we do a better job of communicating and staying within our God-given roles. We have worked out a few kinks with systems that suit our personalities. We still have a way to go, but truly things have gotten better.

Sometimes, the hardest thing to do in all relationships is peacefully accepting your role. I have found that most people have an opinion of how someone is doing a job wrong. It’s human nature. Whether it be the boss’ organization, the coach’s play, or the pastor’s sermon; someone is critiquing. Even if the criticism is legitimate, it’s a form of rebellion. Unfortunately, God designed authority along with roles and responsibilities. Typically, a team of people are needed to successfully accomplish most goals. One person choosing to step outside the realms of their roles, while consistently questioning authority is detrimental to the healthy development of others. Ask Aaron and Miriam (Numbers 12:1-15)!

Do your best in the role you currently have. You will find that your ultimate calling will be fulfilled through your willingness to obey God (Psalms 138:8), where you are at and by cultivating your talents. God has a plan for us all. No one man’s gift is greater than another. We are all valuable. Learn from those in leadership. If you think you can do it better, when your time comes- DO IT BETTER!

Give Jesus your heart and life & see what God will do with it.
http://www.intouch.org/resources/all-things-are-new/content/topic/how_do_i_accept_jesus_as_my_savior_all_things